Can You Help With Doll ID?

Need Help with Doll ID.

I have what I believe is a Midge, red haired Barbie friend.  Her hair is butt length and crimped.  She has green eyes with blue eye liner or eye shadow.  I'm sorry, I forget which kind of eye makeup is blue.    The person who described her to me said she had I Think, a bright pink (rose or coral?) lipstick.

She has a pretty standard Barbie old fashioned face to touch, Except that she has feelable cheekbones and a straight nose which extends just beyond her lips.  (A Nose?)  She also has a definite chin and bangs.

On her back is written, "Mattel, made in China, 1968".  But on the back of her head is the year "1985".

All of the ID your doll sites I can find rely on pictures.  I'm sure they Are worth 1000 words to people who can see.  But to me they are just more flat sh--.

Any help you can give will be Much appreciated.  Thank you!

Where Does Healing Come From

Where Does Healing Come From?

Ideally, emotional/spiritual healing should come from a supportive community of human beings.  But in this alienated dominant culture that often doesn't happen.

No one can or should expect one other person to meet all of their emotional needs.  It isn't possible.  So even though Ann and I truly wanted each other's happiness, we each had to find alternative methods of healing.  Ann used visual art.  For me and for other blind people this wasn't an option.

So where Can healing come from when humans just aren't there?  What props can help?

I know a lady who was put into a state school for the blind, as I was, at age five.  There is no explaining what this does to a child unless you have undergone it yourself.  To say it is terrifying and that the children are starved for love is a bare beginning.  Her family didn't understand her, leading to more pain.  She endured a lot of humiliation.

As an adult she got invited to a Star Trek convention, having watched the show growing up.  She made friends, began attending events, managed the phones, even when people called wanting to talk to the Real Mr. Spock and Captain Kirk, not just faking actors.  She got involved with singers of music built around Sci. Fi. Books and TV.  Her voice was of professional quality.

For her, this association with others and normal socialization brought a lot of healing.

As a child, I did not have fashion dolls to play with.  The two I got were given away to other children, so my mother would not have to buy them Christmas presents.  She followed me around for weeks talking about what a Good Christian would do, etc.  Finally, I felt so guilty I agreed.  (We all know what happens to Bad Christians.)

Even before I was diagnosed as having what the shrinks call DID or MPD, dolls took the place of the little plastic animals who were alter representatives.  I couldn't see my alters in a mirror like a sighted multiple.  But I could pick and touch them as dolls.

So, do I thing fashion dolls are a good body image for young girls, no.  Do I think the workers of Asia who manufacture them have been treated fairly or are treated fairly now, no.

I try now to find dolls which are pre-owned, so I don't contribute to this misery on the part of those who make the dolls.  I am now ready to release the vast majority of my dolls.  So I will sell them.

I have heard of other people tortured and/or disempowered as children who have used dolls, the only people they had Any control over or positive interactions with, for healing.  Some of us have used dolls for healing purposes as adults.

My point is, no one can judge another person's road to healing.  Is it books, TV, little plastic animals, plastic dishes, or dolls?  If healing of the spirit and emotions takes place, who am I to judge?

Heartening and Happy News

Heartening and Happy News

Yesterday I heard a story about a Syrian Christian priest in a mostly Christian village near the Turkish border.  It was a rebel controlled area of Syria and many of the rebels and a few of the residents were Suni Muslims.  He referred to the Muslim young men of the rebels and the residents as "our sons" and the newscast profiled a Muslim mother cooking lunch for her children in safety.  Syria is one of those places where Christianity is ancient and evidently in this particular village Christians and Muslims have lived together in peace and see no need to change the situation.

My prayer is that it Stays that way and Spreads!

Today I heard a medical report from one of the poorest parts of South Africa saying that when anti-AIDS drugs were given life expectancy increased by 11 years.  Also the sexual contacts or partners of people given these drugs were Much less likely to become HIV positive, so that the rate of infection in the province of Qua Zulu Natal was dropping.

South African leaders have had some bizarre notions for stopping the spread of AIDS, and some horrible things have been done by people in their attempts to protect themselves.  But there Is solid evidence that medical treatment works.

Nice to hear Good news for a change!

Hard Choices About Money and Website

Hard Choices

The following is part of an email I wrote to an individual with disabilities about selling their work on my website. It illustrates why "fair trade" is so difficult in the US.  Also, it shows the choices some of us must make.

All identifying info. Is removed.  Frankly, this was a hard letter to write.

New subject:  Pricing your work.  I agree, this is a hard thing for all

of us who are trying to make any money through the internet to do.  The

company called Pay Pal, which will make sure that all money exchanges for

items sold are safe takes ten percent of everyone's profits, mine too.  That

means all of us lose a dime for every dollar of our asking price.

Most stores which will sell the work of an artist ask for half of the

profits, fifty percent, (50%).  I am asking for ten percent, 10% for myself.

This will mean anyone working with me will lose twenty cents for each dollar

an item they have made sells for.  I don't like it either.

My ten percent will help if the State takes away Medicaid this Summer, (we

only kept it by two votes in the Missouri Senate last year) and if I should   need new

hearing aids or to see a Dr.  It will also help me to advertise.  I must

spend time learning how to use Facebook and may take out adds in local

papers.  I will also advertise by using my blog.

I will not be upset if you decide that you want just to keep your own

website.  And I won't be upset if you decide you cannot sell your work at

a reasonable price and lose twenty percent of your profit, twenty cents for

every dollar of profit.

One thing I can tell you is that going into this, I know that none of us,

including me, will be paid for our time.  I spend hours sewing dreadful tiny

doll purses and trying to make them look cute, (as well as matching each doll outfit up with shoes and a color coordinated brush or pick which matches at leas one outfit)  so I can sell a doll for $12

or $13 instead of $10.  Then I know that pay pal will take $1.30, a dollar

and thirty cents from that thirteen dollar doll.  It's depressing, but I

need to make some money, even a little, and I do have time.  No one wants to

hire a totally blind person with a serious  hearing impairment.

So, it is a Very hard decision to realize that you will Not be paid fairly

for your time and neither will I.  My choices are to sit and be mad and sad

or to do what I can.  I do feel angry sometimes, but I  choose to do what I can.

Since people will hire you sometimes  and you can drive, your choices may be less

restricted than mine.  I hope so.

I will be happy to work with you but will understand completely if you

choose not to join my project, no hard feelings on my part.

I hope that all of this makes sense to you.  If not, please do ask more

questions.

Wishing you happiness and choices which will help you most,

Hard Choices

The following is part of an email I wrote to an individual with disabilities about selling their work on my website. It illustrates why "fair trade" is so difficult in the US.  Also, it shows the choices some of us must make.

All identifying info. Is removed.  Frankly, this was a hard letter to write.

New subject:  Pricing your work.  I agree, this is a hard thing for all

of us who are trying to make any money through the internet to do.  The

company called Pay Pal, which will make sure that all money exchanges for

items sold are safe takes ten percent of everyone's profits, mine too.  That

means all of us lose a dime for every dollar of our asking price.

Most stores which will sell the work of an artist ask for half of the

profits, fifty percent, (50%).  I am asking for ten percent, 10% for myself.

This will mean anyone working with me will lose twenty cents for each dollar

an item they have made sells for.  I don't like it either.

My ten percent will help if the State takes away Medicaid this Summer, (we

only kept it by two votes in the Missouri Senate last year) and if I should   need new

hearing aids or to see a Dr.  It will also help me to advertise.  I must

spend time learning how to use Facebook and may take out adds in local

papers.  I will also advertise by using my blog.

I will not be upset if you decide that you want just to keep your own

website.  And I won't be upset if you decide you cannot sell your work at

a reasonable price and lose twenty percent of your profit, twenty cents for

every dollar of profit.

One thing I can tell you is that going into this, I know that none of us,

including me, will be paid for our time.  I spend hours sewing dreadful tiny

doll purses and trying to make them look cute, (as well as matching each doll outfit up with shoes and a color coordinated brush or pick which matches at leas one outfit)  so I can sell a doll for $12

or $13 instead of $10.  Then I know that pay pal will take $1.30, a dollar

and thirty cents from that thirteen dollar doll.  It's depressing, but I

need to make some money, even a little, and I do have time.  No one wants to

hire a totally blind person with a serious  hearing impairment.

So, it is a Very hard decision to realize that you will Not be paid fairly

for your time and neither will I.  My choices are to sit and be mad and sad

or to do what I can.  I do feel angry sometimes, but I  choose to do what I can.

Since people will hire you sometimes  and you can drive, your choices may be less

restricted than mine.  I hope so.

I will be happy to work with you but will understand completely if you

choose not to join my project, no hard feelings on my part.

I hope that all of this makes sense to you.  If not, please do ask more

questions.

Wishing you happiness and choices which will help you most,

Hard Choices

The following is part of an email I wrote to an individual with disabilities about selling their work on my website. It illustrates why "fair trade" is so difficult in the US.  Also, it shows the choices some of us must make.

All identifying info. Is removed.  Frankly, this was a hard letter to write.

New subject:  Pricing your work.  I agree, this is a hard thing for all

of us who are trying to make any money through the internet to do.  The

company called Pay Pal, which will make sure that all money exchanges for

items sold are safe takes ten percent of everyone's profits, mine too.  That

means all of us lose a dime for every dollar of our asking price.

Most stores which will sell the work of an artist ask for half of the

profits, fifty percent, (50%).  I am asking for ten percent, 10% for myself.

This will mean anyone working with me will lose twenty cents for each dollar

an item they have made sells for.  I don't like it either.

My ten percent will help if the State takes away Medicaid this Summer, (we

only kept it by two votes in the Missouri Senate last year) and if I should   need new

hearing aids or to see a Dr.  It will also help me to advertise.  I must

spend time learning how to use Facebook and may take out adds in local

papers.  I will also advertise by using my blog.

I will not be upset if you decide that you want just to keep your own

website.  And I won't be upset if you decide you cannot sell your work at

a reasonable price and lose twenty percent of your profit, twenty cents for

every dollar of profit.

One thing I can tell you is that going into this, I know that none of us,

including me, will be paid for our time.  I spend hours sewing dreadful tiny

doll purses and trying to make them look cute, (as well as matching each doll outfit up with shoes and a color coordinated brush or pick which matches at leas one outfit)  so I can sell a doll for $12

or $13 instead of $10.  Then I know that pay pal will take $1.30, a dollar

and thirty cents from that thirteen dollar doll.  It's depressing, but I

need to make some money, even a little, and I do have time.  No one wants to

hire a totally blind person with a serious  hearing impairment.

So, it is a Very hard decision to realize that you will Not be paid fairly

for your time and neither will I.  My choices are to sit and be mad and sad

or to do what I can.  I do feel angry sometimes, but I  choose to do what I can.

Since people will hire you sometimes  and you can drive, your choices may be less

restricted than mine.  I hope so.

I will be happy to work with you but will understand completely if you

choose not to join my project, no hard feelings on my part.

I hope that all of this makes sense to you.  If not, please do ask more

questions.

Wishing you happiness and choices which will help you most,

"Empire" a book by Orson Scott Card

"Empire" by Orson Scott Card

I just finished reading this book which proposes an alternate future, (I pray) where there is a second civil war in the U.S. between radical left and radical right idealists.

It was definitely worth reading and caused me to take a good look at my own views, which are more left on most issues.

I wish the national background checks for guns only applied to semi-automatics or that these were Banned altogether along with high capacity magazine clips.  But I can understand the fears of people who don't trust the government, (I basically don't) and don't want every gun in the nation registered.  I am NOT interested in taking up arms against the government.  I am Not a survivalist.  As the Minominee Native American poet Chrystos has said, (my paraphrase) "People are already mean enough that I don't want to be around when they get worse." 

This doesn't mean I think all humans are cruel.  We are all Capable of cruelty we never dreamed of I think, but when we can, very many of us choose to be kind and generous.

I'm just saying I can understand people's fears about so much government knowledge of personal lives.

As long as people respect me I don't care what there sexual orientation is or if they marry.  Here I don't see how a middle position is possible.  A civil union which confers all tax and insurance benefits on same sex couples?  I know this is Not enough for gay and lesbian couples and I have a feeling for why.  But how can we as Americans avoid viewing one another with contempt when some of us honestly believe homosexuality is wrong and a sin against God?  I don't know.  My feeling is that being raised in a loving family of Any kind is better than being abused, neglected, or abandoned.  Research I have read seems to say that those raised in same sex couple families are more likely to Try being like their parents, but Not more likely to Choose homosexuality for themselves.

I believe a woman should have the right to a safe, legal, abortion and that Christian people should have the right to Peacefully protest this choice, so long as they aren't blocking clinic doors or threatening clinic employees or the women who go to the clinics.

We simply Have to try to make Room for one another to Exist or this country Will have more violence.

There are times when I have to say to people, "I respect your right to hold that view but I don't agree.  I'm not interested in fighting with you about it but I will talk with you if our goal is Understanding each other, instead of trying to Change or Humiliate each other."  Usually, this isn't the case, unfortunately.

With most people I have just gotten to a place where I don't discuss religion or politics.  It tends to become nasty fast.

I'm interested in the "reproductive Justice Movement" which is different than the right to an abortion.  This movement comes mostly from people of color who are saying, "we might like to have more children, If we had the chance to bring them up with good nutrition, a decent education, and a hope of a job which could support them."  (Again, this is my paraphrase).  Instead, many poor women, of all races including poor white women, opt for abortion to give their living children a chance to survive or do well in life.

Just for the record, I recognize the occasional necessity of a late term abortion, but yes, I have more problems with this.  A mother's life Should be saved to care for her Living children.  But as a Buddhist, I believe the consciousness of a being will go on to find new parents when a woman has an abortion.  I do favor birth control Over abortion.

So I hope I'm left moderate.  I don't want to hate my neighbor, no matter How strongly I disagree.  Some ideas cause angry feelings in me.  I choose not to listen to talk radio at either end of the political spectrum because I believe its purpose is Not to inform, but to preach to those who already adhere to that particular creed and to "entertain" (I don't call it that" by humiliating and laughing with  contempt and scorn on anyone who disagrees.

I found this a thought provoking book, although I did not agree with the author on all points.

Much to be Glad About and Swamped

Swamped

I feel overwhelmed in a positive way.  Of course, there are many political problems I could share on this blog.  But today it is about dolls, disappointed?

The TV interview was broadcast twice yesterday.  I think you will have to cut and paste links to it in your browsers, as I don't know how to insert links like Phily Collector does, so you can go straight to them.

I am told the best link to use with a computer is:

http://ozarksfirst.com/fulltext?nxd_id=763842

Now, once you see me, will you still Speak, or write?  Hope so, but I never know.  For security reasons interviewers chose to focus on blindness.  Had to explain to some of my deaf-blind friends.

There is one person already contacting me about American Girl doll clothes.  I have a few things.  It is easier to sew for larger dolls but I've spent most of my time putting fashion doll outfits together.  Do you Know how Horrid sewing fashion doll Purses is?  They're Tiny, to me unnecessary, and when using slick fabric like satin, with clear thread, (also hard to knot and slick) a Royal Pain in the Backside!  But Each doll I sell will have a complete write up and pictures.  If she has two outfits, each will probably have it's Own purse and matching shoes.  I hope this will replace all of the paper goods destroyed by a formerly discussed tornado and later flooding.

Last Sat. I went to a deaf-blind social.  It was fun.  But turning sideways around the corner of a table to keep talking TASL with someone was hard on my recovering back which is close to nbormal now.  Muscle relaxer time.

So when I'm not doing a write up on a doll, or matching clothing to shoes and hair brush (w9rthless little things) or pick, I'm sewing Doll purses!  Yuck!  I thank the kind friend who volunteers to help me with the matching!

And when I'm not sewing or beading or writing or doing housework or taking care of animals I'm paying extra bills this month.  Cat is sick and we can't figure out why, vet bills.  My phone bill jumped $40 bucks because an application for low income disabled people was never sent and why else?  They don't say but I need a phone.

Much to be Thankful for:  the interview, interest in what I'm doing, food to cook, an almost normal back, a phone, heat, help with color matching, the cat Seems to be improving and the dog and bird and I are all well.  It's just frantic, or I am, trying to get as much as possible ready to go for a hoped for website launch at the end of this month.  (scream!)

One thing I realized after the deaf-blind social is how little I choose to touch anyone.  Talking TASL for hours was a challenge, and difficult at times, but was also comforting, just touching another kind person's hands for that long.

Well, time to check the oven and feed the dog and put away clean clothes then should call a couple of people and sew.  Normal life plus.  Hope sewing goes well this weekend while I listen to audio books.

It's hard to figure out how to price expensive dolls like Bohemian Barbie or the Singapore Airline Stewardess without their original boxes and paperwork.  Any suggestions other than gi' me?

Thanks.

           

On Being Peace

On Being Peace

Once the Dalai Lama went to visit an inner city school in Washington D.D.  He made it clear to the press that he was there to visit with students, not with reporters.

One student asked how to create peace in a place where nobody else seemed to care or to want peace.  The Dalai Lama's answer was, "Sometimes in order to create peace you have to shout."

To me this means that there isn't just one way to be peaceful.  Maybe you have to shout for true dialogue or against the injustice of violence.

I think there are different ways of being peaceful at differing times.  Before the invasion of Iraq Ann and I wrote a letter respectfully asking President Bush Not to invade, to think of all of the wounded veterans, Iraqi civilians, and the destruction of the country of Iraq which war brings.  We took it to our Buddhist group or Sangha and left it on a table.  When the time for announcements came we asked people to please read it and sign it if they agreed.  Most of the group chose to sign it.

I joined silent peace walks against the war  before it began  and support caring for our veterans with respect now.

But today I want to write about more personal examples.  Two years ago today my friend of 30 years and my house mate of 20, Ann, died.  I am thinking about a choice we made together and a choice I made today.

I am more aware of my sadness this year than last.  Most of last year was taken up with just coping.

In May 2007 I bought a small house, after my mobile home was made uninhabitable by the ice storm and Ice covered falling trees in Jan. of that year.  I did not have a subprime mortgate and my credit score was good.  We made all of our payments on time.

We spent thousands of dollars making that house livable, including fixing the basement so it was a usable room, where I kept my doll collection.

In Jan. 2008 a very unseasonable string of tornadoes roared through, rocking our house on its foundation and cracking the foundation, among other things.  Our home insurance company was contacted.  They did not watch the video sent them of the damage.  The first claims adjuster they sent laughed, saying there were some people in another state whose homes had been flooded when they believed they were entitled to coverage, too.  He said the foundation cracks were do to "ground water seepage" though it might have been the storm which took shingles off of the roof.

The "storm" also had blown water up over the three steps to the front porch, over the porch and under the locked front door, weting the wood living room floor.  This was the first thing we cleaned up.

It was a long six month struggle.  We hired our own engineer to look at the damage, we had an inspector from the Small Business Administration look at the damage.  One said our assessment was correct, one said our assessment was most likely to be what had happened.  The insurance company did not budge and our agent made the problem worse.

As this person had been referred to us by a friend we foolishly assumed we could trust the person.  We said we were worried about the furnace being effected Eventually by the water which had flooded the basement.  We said we were worried about possible mold.

This individual reported that our furnace was damaged and that the basement was moldy to the insurance company.  These statements were not true at the time we mentioned them as concerns.

But they became true when flooding occurred in March 2008.  All of the paper items associated with my dolls, boxes, stickers, certificates of authenticity, had to be stripped away from the dolls and pitched.  Of course, this made them nearly worthless in monitary terms.  Some had to have the setting jell combed out of their piled up hair so the hair could be washed and dried to save the doll.  This, of course, also lessened their financial value.  Now I am making clothes for them and planning to sell them.

I had a friend formerly mentioned in a blog post, Miss Alice, who helped me put together a list of the original value of the boxed dolls.  The insurance company did not care.  I also had to strip away cardboard packaging from small action figures.  I went to Many internet sites to determine their prices while still packaged.  Again, the company did not care.

It got to the point where either Ann or I were scrubbing down the basement with bleach once every three days or so.  There wasn't enough ventilation to clear bleach fumes.  Our agent had told us to use nearly undiluted bleach which burned the lung and a half I have.  The physical labor of this work made Ann exhausted enough to be in bed for about two days after each scrubbing.  She was in great pain.

After doing all we could, keeping endless logs of endless phone calls to people from the company and the state commission of insurance, we had a talk.

We were both physically ill and mentally exhausted.  During out talk we remembered the Buddhist idea, "If you want peace then Be peace."  We also both knew that health and time are two things no one can buy back, once they are lost.  We decided not to continue sacrificing our bodies and mental health for property and money, even though we were in the right.

We found a rent house we both loved to move into, stopped making mortgage payments, stopped paying credit card debts in my name, (Ann had only one card, so almost all of our combined debt was in my name.)  And began Saving up money, (of all the ridiculous things) to pay a lawyer so we could declare bankruptcy.

There was no way to pay rent, mortgage on a house we couldn't live in, credit card debts for repairs on that house which were made Before the tornado, and pay people to move us.

I was lucky in that the house went back to the bank in a "short sale" (where someone bought it for a lower price) rather than a foreclosure.  But we went through contacting foreclosure help, as we did not know what would happen.

After exhausting ourselves we finally decided to "be peace."  I lost all credit cards and have never tried to regain any.  We lost the house.  But we were happy in that rent house and I was able to take all unbroken dolls (I only lost three or so) out of the shelves where they had to be jammed and put them where I could find specific dolls once again.  There was room to work and play in that house and yard.  When Ann had to begin using a wheelchair, there was room for that too.  We lived there until she died, two years ago today.

Today I did something as an attempt to "be peace."  I was originally informed in writing that I might do with Ann's possessions as I thought best.  I donated her disability supplies, clothing, dishes, art supplies,  and other things to local agencies.  I sent a lot back to her family, things which might have sentimental value like Christmas ornaments, pictures and cards, yearbooks, baby shoes, some art work, etc.

Now someone has changed their mind and may want all of Ann's art work.  Originally, I had planned to sell my own work, matting each piece of Ann's visual art as I could afford to, then selling the art work, so I could purchase fair trade items made by people with disabilities wholesale.  I had to decide what to do.

"Being peace" does not mean I necessarily Feel Peaceful.  It means I make a decision to do what I think will create peace and then make a commitment to work through any negative feelings I have about my decision until I Feel more peaceful.

Sometimes you have to shout for peace, sometimes you have to hide people from your own family, as some people protected those who would have been killed during the genocide in Rwanda. Sometimes you have to risk your life or go to prison or cross religious lines as the Christian and Muslim women of Liberia did to hold prayer meetings together.  Sometimes you have to shame violent men into peace, as these brave women also did.

My choice is much less difficult, but still painful, as her visual art was a central way in which Ann expressed herself.  We talked about most of the pieces she created.

In my case I have to give up something I wanted very much and not know the end result.  I could either fight with the person who changed their mind, bringing hostility between Ann's family and friends and myself.  Or I could offer the person who may take all of Ann's art work the chance to do so.

This is what I chose to do.  I do not know what will happen.  But I know I Won't end up in a long squabble with anyone connected to Ann.

I feel sad and angry.  I protected Ann by putting in writing that all of my possessions were hers if I died first. She did not.  But then I had dealt with cancer twice and knew closely that I will die.

I know Ann's art has the power to help others and to make them happy because I saw this when she gave it to people during her lifetime.  Will it help the person who may take it?

One thing I had to learn is that if you have an emotional hole inside, things alone won't heal or fill it.  Will giving Ann's work to the person who wants it help them learn this?  Will more healing be done by giving up Ann's art work and my plans for it to one person or by fighting to keep it and spreading it around?  I do not know.

All I Do know is if I let go of my end of a "tug of war" rope I leave the person at the other end free to choose what they truly believe they need and to then learn if they were right.  Also, I know I am not beginning a new venture with a hostile action or one which will create anger and discord and hurt feelings.  There hasn't been a fight about this yet,  and now there won't be.  This is all I can know.  I will work through my own upset feelings because I am the one who chose this course of action.

For me today, this is "being peace."

I'm not sure I should share this, but I will, hoping it is useful to someone.