Saturday, September 28, 2013

Personal Feelings and Deaf or Blind Women Caught in Domestic Violence

Personal Post and deaf women caught in domestic violence.

Personal Note:

Feeling Much better!  Have progressed back to headaches, irritable, (in my head snarky comments) low tolerance of frustration, a Great improvement.  Sleeping schedule still screwed, but I hope will straighten out in time.

Deaf Women And Men in Domestic Violence

A friend of mine is attending a conference about domestic violence.  She and one other person will be allowed to speak for a Whole Ten Minutes, (10 min. Between them in a Day Long Conference) about people with disabilities caught in domestic violence.  One of these two people will be speaking about architectural barriers.  If a shelter has stairs, how is a person using a wheelchair supposed to access it?  If a person cannot walk far or becomes easily exausted while standing in line, can that person access services?

My friend is Generously given 5 Five minutes to cover all other disability issues.  Reminds Me of the Three minutes I was Supposed to get at the end of an hours long conference concerning the changes at our state social services agency.  I pointed out that I had listened to all other speakers with respect and asked for the same.  Then I took Seven minutes, as the only person with a disability present, to explain how the changes were and would be effecting different groups of people with disabilities.  Of course, I was the Last speaker and everyone wanted to get home.  Tokenism.  But I did it because I was the Only speaker with disabilities.

I asked my friend if she was planning to talk about the language barrier for deaf people seeking shelter from domestic violence.

The way it too often goes is this.  Kids with disabilities are abused in all ways at a higher rate than their non-disabled counterparts.

Abusers think "who's a deaf kid going to tell?"  or, "She can't see who's doing it, can't prove it was me" in the case of a blind child.  In the case of a child with intellectual disabilities, severe autism, the same assumptions may be made.

We have learned that some abused children become abusers.  Others continue to be victims of abuse. 

Unfortunately, police often harbor the same prejudgements about people with disabilities as the general public.  There have been cases where deaf people have spoken to police in writing and via interpreters in their own language, ASL., to swear out complaints of abuse against a specific person and nothing was done.

Deaf and DUMB?  How about deaf and highly intelligent?

If a Latina goes to a shelter without much command of English it Should be obvious she Must have an interpreter who is skilled in translation.  This doesn't happen often enough either.

If a deaf woman goes to a shelter she is not likely to get an interpreter in this area.  So how does she receive counseling?  A few notes, no Group interaction.  How does she receive support, some smiles, some avoidance from fear.    How does she find out what services are available to her?  A list of shelter rules and some fliers on local agencies. 

Some deaf people have difficulty reading because they went to hearing schools or schools insisting on oralism (speaking) where the alphabet was taught by, yep, Phonics! 

A friend who had once worked at a domestic violence shelter told me once that the deaf women who came for help usually went back into their situations.  Makes horrible sense to me.  They went back into situations and communities where there was at least communication, some support possible from friends who spoke their language, and some degree of acceptance, even if it was from an abuser.

So I urged the lady given five big minutes to cover other barriers than architectural ones to Please speak up for Deaf people seeking Shelter from domestic violence!  Tokenism?  Yep, but at least Someone will  e there.

For blind people it's easier in some ways.  We can verbalize, whether we are believed or not.  But we can't access the flat s--- given us and there isn't necessarily someone available to read it.  Also, there may be strong reactions of annoyance to our white canes or dog guides.  A deaf person who comes with a Hearing Dog may face the same problem.  b  

On the other hand, if we blind people don't use our canes, sighted people may grow hysterical if we bump into them, trip over something left in the floor, or run into an object.  So which way do you want it, anyhow?

If you are deaf-blind and do not posess a will of titanium, give Up!

New Post: Sat. Sept. 28.

Feeling Better today, got two more hours of sleep last night.  Something is in very dark (not milk) chocolate which helps me sleep.  I ate two squares before bed.  Makes you want a toothbrush first thing when you wake, but it Works.  Because it's Sat. I slept until 9:30 and only stayed awake for half an hour or so at my usual 4:30 to 5:00 wake up time.  Eight Hours for the first time in Weeks!  Yeah!

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