Sunday, October 30, 2011

Dear Mr. President:

Dear Mr. President:

I worked for you in the Springfield, Mo. Campaign office and did some canvassing also. I felt Hopeful when you were elected, actually, I felt Joyful! And so did a lot of others.

My thoughts were: 1. It would b Great to have a Constitutional lawyer in the White House, as I haven't always been sure some of our past Presidents could have Passed a high school Constitution test, and I Knew some of the candidates couldn't. 2. I had tremendous respect for you because you spoke out from the Senate about the deaths and lack of help offered to the living who survived hurricane Katrina. I thought, surely, This President will do something to help them. 3. As someone living in the Mo. Ozarks, I Agreed with your statements to the effect that when people become frightened they turn too often, to their Bibles and guns. Have you or any of your staff seen the movie "Winter's Bone" or better yet, read the book? I do not agree with turning to Bibles and guns but sir, some people here have little else to turn too, besides Meth! 4. Except for damning the whole country in the name of God, I agreed with much of what your former pastor Mr. Jeremiah Wright had to say. I thought it took courage for you to go on television to talk as frankly about race as possible, but I still agreed with much that Mr. Wright had to say. 5. I was impressed by your grasp of the struggles facing Native American people. I read through your policy plans pretty carefully before choosing to work for you, so that I could answer questions if they came my way. And 6. I thought that your views, on the economy, Iraq, nuclear disarmament, and many other issues were similar to mine.

Then I went to work in your campaign office. As a totally blind person with a significant hearing impairment, of course, your campaign staff did not know how to cope with me. Nothing new there. I invented work for myself, besides shredding tons of papers required to be shredded. Once people discovered that with hearing aids I can speak intelligently and understand most people, I went canvassing. We found that people were more reluctant to turn a blind woman away from their doors and that a male and female team could usually engage with some issue the house occupant cared about better than either two women or two men. Also, a male female team could help one another understand the people we spoke with. Once we talked to a woman supporting John Edwards who was devastated by his extra marital affair. We spoke about you and Mrs. Obama and your dedication to your daughters. But she just said her trust had already been betrayed by one supposedly trustworthy candidate. The person I was working with that day was a young man from St. Louis, who was enrolled in an Ivy League School. He was completely baffled. I suggested that maybe this woman had recently been through a divorce or had her trust betrayed in some serious way, and her response began to make Possible sense to him.

I said I invented my own work. This is true. I got listings of all of the groups of blind people in the area of this campaign office. In many small towns there are such groups, chapters of national organizations, meeting monthly. I am not aware of any who would have refused to meet with someone from the official campaign office of a Presidential candidate. We are used to being ignored. All of this info. Was turned Over to the college student running the office and I volunteered to go and speak, but I needed a ride, and possibly some back up, if a question came along which I couldn't answer. The info. was ignored.

I also worked with an artist to make a drawing for signs with the finger spelled letters of your name. It wasn't easy to sit there, holding my hand in the position of a particular letter until all of my fingers cramped, but I did. I looked for Obama signs in ASL on the internet and could only find one place which could make them for a price. The drawing with suggestions for its use was turned over to your office coordinator, and ignored.

Among suggestions for using this sign was meeting with local groups of deaf citizens in major towns like Springfield and Joplin. At that time I researched them on the net and also had contacts with the Independent Living Center in Springfield who would have told me who to speak to in other towns, who would speak ASL as an interpreter, etc. Ignored when presented.

Lastly, I belonged to One More Group of people who are usually ignored, Native Americans. The local Indian Center cannot, by policy, take part in politics, but they lost an excellent social worker due to lack of funding for the Indian Child Welfare Act, and had other legitimate concerns which your policies, as written online, might have addressed. Mr. President, Poverty is Not Neglect. Putting plastic over the windows to insulate for Winter, heating with wood, children sleeping together for warmth in a bed, these are All things I have done. Though I am not enrolled in any tribe I know that to be loved, and to be educated are Far more important than to be wealthy. Did Any of your staff Happen to catch the National Public Radio report on how Federal funds offer Incentives to poor states to remove Native children who Aren't abused and put them up for adoption to Non-Native families? It aired Oct. 25th of this year. The abuse which can happen to Any child in the foster care system may be happening today, Here, because there is no funding for an Indian Child Welfare worker in Springfield, Mo. Anymore. Where did it go? I have known about the abduction of Native kids from reservations for years. What I Didn't know was that Tax Dollars, Federal Funds were incentivizing a "trade" in Native children. Why not hire Indian Child Welfare workers with this money?

I suggested putting an add in the local paper of Newton County, at that time the county with the largest Native population, and scheduling a meeting to discuss your policies, ignored.

I should have seen then what was to happen, but some of us are so completely Used to being ignored that we take it for granted, a backwards Entitlement, if you will. I continued to do what I was told and stopped doing anything else, on my own time.

The night you were elected my disabled room mate and I stayed up late to listen to your acceptance speech, cheering and clapping, although she was the artist who spent hours getting the light and shadows just right so your name, finger spelled in ASL would look clear and elegant. I don't know what happened to her work, maybe the circular file.

So, you inherited a disaster, two wars, a possible bank crash, and a crashed housing market and climbing unemployment. I distrusted your bailing out the Big banks and insurance companies first. I believe that in order to become a viable presidential candidate one must have corporate ties and corporate money. But since you had only been a senator from Illinois for a relatively short time, maybe you weren't Too deeply in debt to big multi-national corporations. Now I believe I must have been wrong. And in that case, I am With the Occupy Wallstreet movement, Get Corporate Money Out of Politics, a Corporation is Not a Citizen with the same rights, regardless of that Supreme Court Decision. The Only interest a multi-national corporation has in America is A., what they can take, and B., keeping laws and government friendly to their interests.

The Ex-Checker in Britain said if banks were Truly too big to fail, maybe they should "go across the pond" where they can be bailed out. Mr. President, you took tax payers money and gave it to multi-national banks and insurance companies. It certainly "was as popular as a root canal" with me. But I told myself, wait, he's new to the office, give him time.

While I was waiting I kept listening for news of help for Katrina survivors. I did hear that for $5 poor families in the gulf states could Buy the Trailers they had already lived in for years. Mr. President, have you ever Lived in a Trailer? I did, for 20 years. They take constant regular upkeep, cheaper than the maintenance needed for a house, but required to maintain a trailer in anything Like a Liveable state. A grandmother of a family of Twelve was interviewed (again by NPR) who said she would Not buy her Two bedroom, One bathroom trailer, even for five bucks. She said she Would buy a Three bedroom trailer. Earlier I said that I think love and education, (including education in one's own culture) are the most important things. I do. But have you ever waited in a line of twelve for a single bathroom? I have and it's Not easy. Is this Truly all that could be done for the people who gave you your First National speaking opportunity? Why not offer banks a chance to pay back some of their bail out money by financing new, Affordable homes for Katrina's survivors? Weren't there any construction workers out of a job who could have done this? Weren't their any decently built foreclosed houses which Katrina survivors might have occupied in Gulf Coast states?

I don't think most Americans would have objected to such plans for helping our own citizens as we do to just handing tax money over to corporations who continue to pay CEO's ridiculous salaries and bonuses and in some cases, still manage badly.

You had more Democrats in Congress during those first couple of years and I would like sincerely to Thank You for Obamacare. I don't know how it's all going to work out, but I have a friend who may be dying but cannot afford to find out because she has no insurance. She is hoping to hang on until more provisions of the Affordable Care Act take effect. Obamacare is a name you should wear proudly, in my opinion. It isn't perfect, but it IS something significant, Thank You.

Also, I am sorry there seems to be a witch hunt going on about One alternative energy company which did not spend, or is Alleged not to have spent, its Federal dollars as intended. I am glad Some small companies got money to start or expand alternative energy jobs and technologies.

But, while the banks got saved a shrinking middle class "Main Street" and even more devastatingly, "Poor Street" rotted.

And what else happened? You had no problem with a nuclear weapons plant being constructed, to make 90% of the components for nuclear weapons, in Kansas City, Mo. You said it would create jobs, and so did Honeywell Corporation. Are these the kinds of jobs we Want to create? Jobs to help in potentially bringing Death to your daughters and my niece and nephew? I do understand, if the info. I found is true, that the plant may not handle Any radioactive materials, but can the Non-fisionable materials for a nuclear bomb or warhead be used for Peaceful purposes? Is the Congress Really the only body to blame for money Not being invested in green energy jobs? Surely a President whose State Dept. rails at Iran for developing the bomb and engages in talks with North Korea for the same reason shouldn't be Giving the Go-
Ahead for corporations here to do More of the same!

And what's this about Not implementing EPA regulations to cut down on air pollution? You said these regulations would cost jobs. If multi-national corporations were given Other insentives to stay, surely it would Give jobs to the people building and installing new air pollution controlling technologies. This I think would be Better than a president giving the nod to more Nuclear Weapons building!

Mr. President, you have a daughter with asthma, but you can move away from a polluting factory! What happens to the children and the grandmothers caring for children who cannot? Haven't you given the rich Enough Yet?

I know, Congress is a bust. But Why do you lean more and more Toward corporate America. Oh yah, it's re-election time.

And Why don't we protect the civilians of Burma or Syria or Tibet as well as we, being part of NATO protected those in Lybia, our Third war? Oh, they either have big military machines or No Oil! Those dreadful, ungrateful Iraqi politicians aren't selling Us the oil we were Told would pay for our war in Iraq. Will Lybia? Should Lybia? They have greater needs than we do for nearly Everything, Especially outside large towns. I never supported Either Sadam Hussein Or Colonel Gadafi, how Could I? But that doesn't mean I supported intervening in Iraq Or Lybia, I didn't.

Now I wonder about sending "military advisors" to fight the Lord's Resistance Army in Uganda, the Democratic Republic of Congo, and other Central African nations. Isn't that how we got into El Salvador and Nicaragua? And is this the humanitarian gesture I pray it is, or does it have anything to do with rich natural resources in DRC and possibly other Central African countries? If it is purely a humanitarian action, not resulting in mining or other rights granted to multi-national corporations based in the U.S. or Britain, then Mr. President, I will be the First to congratulate you and I will want to hug you in thanks!

I think we need an eight year one term presidency. Two years to learn the job, six years to try and do it, and No More Time Wasting with one to two Years of Re-election rhetoric!

I would be happy to vote for a third party in the primary, which talked about "poor street" for a change. Since everyone except the top 1% of America wants to pretend they are middle class, that's who all presidential candidates pitch to. During your election campaign my room mate and I (who lived on Social Security Disability) often said things like, "If I hear Middle Class one more time I'm going to Hurl!" And doubtless, that's what we will hear again this time.

Do you have Any Idea how many Professionally Educated people are floating from one temporary job to the next? And do you Know how many Food banks are running Out of Food? We don't Need to burn Food for biofuels! Use fast food restaurant Grease, Heaven Knows, there is Plenty of it and already a few biodiesel stations are up and running in California! Here, in the Ozarks, Everything is fried. It's a Perfect Place to have gross endlessly renewed resources for biodiesel.

I've noticed that the more firey words of the President Obama I voted for are coming back in your campaign speeches. I may not vote this time. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice . . . .

A number of years ago a valued friend voted for Ralph Nader. At that time I bought the Party Lines (they agree on this) that it was throwing away a vote, as it would take votes Away from a mainstream candidate. Her response was that she just Had to vote her conscience this time. I'm Finally beginning to understand how she felt.

Sir, I wouldn't want your job for Any money, and no, I don't think I could do better. But I still have the right, for now, to read, write, and think, unlike some of the kids in Kansas City, where about half of the schools have been closed, due to funding shortages.

Part of the problem is that we who voted for you expected too much. We were so Happy to see someone who might Actually be at least a Partial Outsider elected that we hoped for and needed too much. Just for the record, I did Not vote for my district's representative in the House, Or the Republican Senator from Mo. Who won. I am Not a Democrat Or a Republican. I just Wish it were Possible to elect a President free of corporate interests, so he/she could protect both "Main Street" and "Poor Street." But it doesn't Seem possible. I opposed NAFTA, "Trickle down economics" and I oppose allowing truckers from Mexico to drive our nation's highways and work for less, taking American trucker's jobs.

I Support your original "Path to Citizenship" for illegal immigrants already here. But under NAFTA, Mexico was Supposed to develop environmental and safety rules, so companies based here couldn't mistreat Mexican workers, And so they wouldn't move South of the border. Did this happen? In general, no.

If truck drivers from Mexico had to pass the same licensing requirements as our drivers and earned the same salaries, I would be fine with this change. But I think it will end up Just Like NAFTA. Clearly, you Aren't responsible for NAFTA, but the trucker's issue Is on your watch.

Our gay and lesbian citizens still need help getting into hospitals to see their loved ones, and in many other areas of civil rights.

But I can honestly close this letter with another genuine Thank You. Thank you for going about repealing "Don't ask, don't Tell" in such a careful and intelligent way. Getting commanders of branches of the military to survey their troops first and to figure out How to do this was Great. There will undoubtedly be problems, just as there were when African Americans were integrated into the Armed Forces, under President Truman. But I am Very Relieved to Finally see discrimination against our gay and lesbian service people Begin to End! Thank You for this, Mr. President!

Sincerely,


Newby13 will be sending this letter to the White House. Wonder if I've said anything Blogger objects to.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

What's With the Zombi Craze? Deer Hunting,

The Mo. Dept. of Conservation has created a guide on zambee detection and defense, for those who are outdoors. I don't think human beings who are convinced that They are zambees, as has happened in Haiti in the past is One Bit Funny. It is slavery!

But when a new bizarre fad like vampires and now zambees comes along in the U.S. does it mean anything? Personally, I don't like either vampire or zambee lore and movies. I find real life scary enough.

But last night on the BBC there was a conference at a University in England, supposedly attempting to find out Why zambees are a big deal. It didn't sound like they came up with any conclusions. Are there already Zambee Dolls? Yuck!

Does anyone Get It?

Anyway, the Conservation Dept. has broken with tradition and put up this very creative web page.

http://mdc.mo.gov/zombies



Please Don't read it if you find the whole idea creepy or offensive. It is not obscene, but does have some pictures of zombis around a hunter in a deer stand.

About Deer Hunting.

Most people I have met from larger cities Hate deer hunting. What about the facts? I don't take pleasure in the death of deer, wild or domestic turkeys, or any other animal killed for food. But I am Very Grateful to be kept alive by their gift of life, which means their death.

We are stealing the habitat of deer and other free creatures. If no one hunted, they would slowly starve to death in Winter. I'm glad I am a renter, which means I'm not building a huge house in the woods, taking away more land and food plants for the free beings of the woods. If this is karma, I'm thankful for it.

I use to Hate deer hunting too. What I hated was: people who did not know the area coming down, shooting anything that moved, (people's dogs, cattle, deer too young to be legally hunted.) and getting drunk, posing a danger to Everyone in the country. The Conservation Dept. has worked on this with a good deal of success. Now hunters usually Do wear Something orange, (usually a hat) so they don't shoot other hunters. There is Very Little killing of deer and just taking antlers, another thing I think is Imoral.

Lots of people still have to keep a much closer eye on their dogs and livestock during deer season, but through education, the situation has improved.

If a hunter kills a deer and doesn't want the meat, local food banks are Delighted to get it. This gift from the deer keeps a lot of people from small towns and cities alive during Winter.

I am friends with a couple who hunt Legally on the acreage attached to their farm. They buy tags, with enables the Dept. of Conservation to continue its education efforts and work to Protect the free animal populations.

Ann and I used to thankfully eat the meat of one deer a year. This year I have extra meat which I am sharing and will share with local people who need help with food.

I ask my friends, when they shoot a deer which will give me life to go to that deer and pray. I ask them to thank the deer for it's gift of life to those who need the meat. They do this because they know I'm serious about it.

As soon as they can, they call me to let me know we, or I have a deer. The first thing I do after thanking them for hunting for me and other disabled and elderly people and getting off of the phone is pray. I also thank the spirit of the deer and tell that spirit I will not waste the sacrifice it has made. I pray that this spirit will never suffer from hunting and being shot again. When I pay for the processed meat of the deer and take it home, I always lay my hands on some unwrapped meat (to remind myself that this once was a free being and to show that I'm not too proud to touch the food I am given) and I repeat my earlier prayer.

I feel sad at the death of a deer, but I am also Very Happy that I will have some meat to eat and to Share through the hard times of Winter.

People who come to retire here (and often build megahouses) start by scorning those who hunt. But if they get out of their own circles of frinds to see some of the poverty that is here, the lack of decent jobs, how the deer meat is shared, sometimes they come to understand. I hope that you will maybe understand that hunting doesn't Have to be gratuitous killing.
Each deer season I say a prayer that "if it is meant to be," I will have a deer to share and eat from. My friends are very careful hunters who won't kill the young deer. And once in a while it is Not meant to be. I'm not sure what to do this year. Since Ann died last Feb. (doesn't seem possible) and I don't need as much meat protein as she did, (she was diabetic and deer is Very lean meat) I still Have deer meat. But there are a Lot of hungry people around, in this economy, it would be Good to give them food. So I don't know whether to ask my friends to hunt a deer for me or not.

My spelling of Zombi is wrong, I found that out from the link above. But my spell check Won't work with Blogger, so I can't correct it, sorry.

Woops, I did it again, put a word Not Allowed in Labels, "yuck"! Is thi another case of "Damn You Autocorrect" or is Yuck really so Offensive? Sometimes I begin to think I live in a book banning town, only its a Virtual town called Blogger.

And author Eli Perrizer is right, since I look up dolls via Goofball, (Google) my political views were Assumed and when I tried to access a particular type of website on a political issue, it couldn't be found! All that turned up in my results were websites with the Opposing view to mine on the issue. I had to State my political opinion in the Searchbox to get Other websited. So, if you play with dolls, Goofball thinks it knows All About you! Ridiculous!

Friday, October 28, 2011

Apologies and Explanations

For anyone freaked out by a wolf with a turkey feather in its mouth, I wasn't glorifying animal cruelty. I grew up partly in the woods and All dog relatives, wild dog packs which formed from abandoned dogs, coyotes, foxes, hunted to eat. So it didn't seem out of place for me to portray a wolf who hunted for food.

I did not expect to hear the NPR story about Native kids being taken from home, and I Certainly didn't expect to get the E-mail about a Native child killed in foster care on the same day. I threw something lightweight and not At anything, after becoming angry at the NP
R story. Then after getting the E-mail I wanted to throw up.

I started this blog as therapy after Ann's death because we talked about everything. Had Ann been alive, we woujuld have discussed this. And yes, it is equally hideous when Any child is killed in foster "care". I wondered if, in Oklahoma, the death of an African American child would have been treated with equal carelessness, probably so, and the death of a severely disabled child as well. I was not trying to say that the death of a Native child was more important than the death of Any child of Any race or combination of races.

I used the blog as therapy, as I might have talked with Ann, who was European-American.

It was a depressing blog week, especially if, living in a city, hunting for food is an alien concept. I tried to lighten it by talking truthfully about my experiences with Ebay and Amazon, but those of you who are doll collectors probably already knew this info.

As a blind person growing up hearing derogatory things about my looks, dolls were one of the ways I used (with Ann's help) to try and sort out what I looked like to others who weren't related. I also thought the way a visual artist perceived skin tones was fascinating. If this offended anyone, I apologize. If no one is offended by my posts this week, thank you for your patience.

I like G.I. Joe figures. Once I took a "Navajo Code Talker" Joe to the Indian Center in Springfield, and you would have thought I brought diamonds and gold. Wish there were More positive role models like that. The Choctaw Nation serve the U.S. military in the same way during World War I. Wish they'd do a Choctaw Joe.

I'm Not knowledgeable about Joe's, but Like very much that African American soldiers, and European American soldiers, male and female, are represented. I'm saving up for the Japanese-American soldier, (don't know how to spell Nise, in Japanese pronunciation, correctly) again, I apologize.

I was glad they made a Vietnam War nurse, which I have.

Outside of Joe's as political symbols, I enjoy them as ""dolls" the articulation is great and for the females, they are more Human shaped than fashion dolls. There heads and faces are also usually well sculpted.

Last but not least, I found some old scraps of brown and white fur, made my wolf costume a tail. The white makes it look like I dragged it through someone's campfire, (made an ash of myself? (smile) or in the snow. But it's a fine thick long tail I will pin to the inside lining of my coat, which is part of the costume.

Have a great weekend.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Ebay is a cheaper place to buy dolls? Since When? I can remember So many times hearing people, both in person and on TV say you get Real Bargains on Ebay. They advise to buy things with no picture, (no problem there) and fix them up, then resell. But it Doesn't seem to apply to Dolls!

Even when something Does have a picture I have found that when it's available it is usually cheaper on Amazon or Amazon Market Place. Of course, shipping charges have to be taken into account, but on Ebay some of the shipping charges are Much Worse than on Amazon! I only found one site where it is clearly stated, "I won't charge any more to ship this item than it costs to ship this item," and that site is out of business.

If you order dolls online, where do you go? It's obviously cheaper to drive to stores and buy dolls and/or their clothes and gear on sale or on clearance. But if you don't have that option, what do you do?

Does anyone want to offer suggestions for most reasonably priced online doll sites?

Thanks
My costume for the oncologist Monday, Happy Howloeen! Pictures taken and captioned by my friend Wendi.

Halloween Costume

Here's a picture of my halloween costume. The first image is a bit funny since the digital camera is having issues. But the way the light was reflecting, it did give the photo a nice edge to it.




Here's one that was taken in a dark area with no light, only flash from the camera. The feet were made from taking werewolf gloves, cutting them down the side and slipping them over a pair of slippers.



And then there's Lister who was quite bored with what we were doing.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Sent to me by a friend who is Cherokee, Shawne, and Navajo, as well as Germane

Teresa,
I found this looking into more of the foster care situation. I don't know if you
heard of the little girl named Naomi Whitecrow. I've attached the article from change.org
where a petition was started for her.
Naomi Whitecrow, a 2-year old Native American Child who belonged to The Cheyenne/Arapaho
Tribes was murdered by her 2nd foster parent, Amy L. Holder at a rural Logan County
residence on January 20, 2009. Amy Holder, an Edmond woman, was found guilty of Naomi's
death and the jury's recommendation was a $5000.00 fine for this offense. Naomi's
1st foster mother, Alicia Taylor testified at the trial of Amy L. Holder. This is
a gross miscarriage of justice.
The Logan County jury spared Amy Holder from jail, but there are serious questions
the Department of Human Services has failed to answer over the foster mother's record.
Holder was arrested almost one year after Naomi's death.
The State Medical Examiner's Office
originally ruled Naomi's cause of death as undetermined and did not suspect foul
play. The OSBI later received a tip that the death was suspicious. Forensics experts
were called in to investigate and determined
the child died of BLUNT FORCE UNJURY to the head, abdomen and extremities.
http://www.news9.com/story/11834626/foster-mom-arrested-almost-1-year-after-childs-death?redirected=true
By killing Naomi Mrs Holder took away a future life of a nation.
The Arapaho and Chayene nations demand this case is reopened and reviewed so that
equal justice prevails.
The minimum sentence for child manslaughter is 25 years.
This woman, Amy Holder got a $5,000 fine
and to go home - whereas to
shoot a deer
in the state of Alabama, incurs a
$10,000 fine. If you kill a baby
it is child manslaughter.
Under the Child Fostering Law
Indian children must be fostered out to native families.
We are demanding that the child fostering process in the case of Naomi is properly
investigated.
We the people of the Cheyenne and Arapaho Tribes, native Americans and friends around
the world are hereby demanding
Equal justice under the Law, equal respect for life regardless of race or colour
and Equal Rights under the Constitution.
Native American families deserve justice and the same rights to the service and protection
from law enforcement
in their towns, counties, and states.
PLEASE SIGN THIS PETITION
- for the attention of the Governor Mary Fallin.
PLEASE CONTACT GOVERNOR FALLIN - by email "Governor Mary Fallin"
OR get your message to her by phone: (405) 521-2342
AND Let Her know your demands on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/GovernorMaryFallin
WE URGE YOU - to contact Thomas E Perez, Assistant Attorney General, US Dept. of
Justice, he's the head of the civil rights division.
http://www.justice.gov/crt/
FINALLY PLEASE VISIT NAOMI´S PAGE on Facebook, give your support and share with your
family and friends. We need the the Governor and US Administration to know the World
is Watching - Together we must Stop this Ever Happening Again.
Thank you !

Years in jail for smoking marijuana, years in jail for stealing a TV and computer, against This! Story speaks for itself. Last paragraph written by Newby13

Check Out This Story, Please

I cannot seem to get the link to yesterday's report on Federal funds incentivizing the removal of Native American children from their homes. But it aired yesterday on NPR.org (Oct. 25th,) on the program "All Things Considered." The Indian Center in Springfield, Mo. has Lost the excelent social worker who was supposed to Protect Native kids in foster care, under the provisions of the Federal law known as the "Indian Child Welfare Act" passed in the late 1970's, I think. The funding cuts which took away the social worker's position did Not occur due to the banking bail-out or the housing market crash. They happened Before all of that. So what is described as happening in S. Dakota is most likely Also happening in other states, Especially Poor ones or those states hit hardest by Recent bad economic conditions. These may include: New Mexico, Nevada, Utah, Michigan, New York, and other states (Oklahoma and California too) which have significant numbers of enroled Native Americans. States which behave as S. Dakota does are Trading Native kids' lives for money, State Revenue, given by the Federal Government. Obscene! Please check out this story.

Monday, October 24, 2011

A Couple of Questions, then Heavy Post

Did a doll ever get made of the African American Babysitter's Club member, Jessie, or Jesse? She had a little sister Rebecca, called Becca. One of my explorations into what it might have been like to be a Normal Junior High kid was to read those books. Fun, but like another planet.

Does anyone know how diverse the very Old "Happy to Be Me" doll series ever really got?

Below is some old writing I found, adapted a bit since Ann's death. You may not wish to read it if you are in a good or silly mood. Just consider it tomorrow's post. Iff I can't get rid of this Headache tonight, there won't Be a post tomorrow, anyway.

Dolls and Me

This is largely old writing about a blind person who has been called ugly all of her life wondering what she Really looks like. No mirror to check. My adult friends now don't think I am ugly and I have finally gotten to the place where I think I pass ok in the looks department, neither especially ugly nor especially beautiful. That's good for me.

I have left the old writing mostly unchanged, but have added more about Ann in the past tense, since her death.

This is also about trying to find out if I am worthy, worthwhile, as a human being. Dolls can't tell me that. But for a while I used to think that if I found a doll who looked like me I could decide who she Seemed, what kind of person she Seemed to be.


Ann knew so much about herself, places she had lived in past lives, who she had been, how she felt in each moment of her current life.

I buried it all and cannot find me now or ever. Why did I forget so deeply and permanently? I don't know what it means but still I go about, trying to find myself.

Foreign foods, I try them, hoping some will seem familiar, and a few have. I listen to music from around the world to see if Any of it Sounds familiar and some does. A Lakota lullaby, music from Eastern Europe, where East and West meet with a Turkish influence, music from North Africa where one can hear the Mediterranean influence, Pacific Island music from Hawaii and the aboriginal people of Taiwan, , and some from East Asia, seeming to stop at some place in Nepal or India.

Then there are dolls. But they don't make any who look like me. The closest Ever was a Totsy or Totsie Doll who was supposed to be Native American. She had a squared high forehead, dark large eyes, long brown/bladk hair, a long face, and elevated cheekbones which didn't make her eyes slant. She was skinny and reminded me of one of my grandmothers who worked like a horse, as they say here. That grandmother was Swiss, English, and as far as I know, entirely European. But her husband was Native, white, and possibly African American. He worked her Hard!

I named that doll Horse Woman because the Cherokee word for horse translates as something like "burden-bearer" So her name to me meant She Who Bears the Burdens. Is that me? I always thought that doll felt skinny and mistreated and like she had been raped, as a woman. My own abuse started as a child.
No doll ever made really looked like me, I'm lighter in color than Horse Woman, and have a British nose. Is it English or Scotish? My best friend and partner used to annoy me by saying I had a Barbie nose! If so, then it's the Only thing we have in common, a small turned up nose in this face. Ann was a visual artist whose work has sold at a gallery. Once when I wore a multi-colored shawl woven in Cambodia she said she could see something in me that wasn't Native or white. She thought it was African blood. This is possible, also.

Once Ann said my complexion was kind of like the comic book Electra, no, not Barbie's silver skinned, pink haired friend, although I like bright colors in hair.

She said a person's skin tone was usually at least three layers of color. She had to learn to paint all kinds of skin tones, so she should know. Both Electra and I have black basically straight hair. Ann said I have an ivory layer on top, a reddish layer under that, and a light brown layer under those two. (I guess that's the way it would be painted.) Electra must have had something similar. But I don't have long doll legs and cannot remember Electra's face just now, but I liked her long straight black hair and her Knives, one in each hand.

We must all really be wonderful combinations of tones and colors. Ann might describe one African American doll as having different shades of brown to her skin, neither warm nor cool. Another AA doll might have a reddish undertone beneath the first layer of brown, giving her a "warm undertone", while still another might have a grayish, purple, or yellow tone or tones. The mixing of these color tones would determine what colors of clothing a doll looked best wearing. I was fascinated by a discussion of color Tones, which lead to infinite variety. Ann Hated "That Same shiny Hershey brown Barbie gives to so many Kristy dolls." She thought it was both obnoxious and poorly done coloring, almost always. She helped me pick dolls with all kinds of tones and I always asked her to describe them.

So, a "Barbie nose, Horse Woman's face, except for the nose, Electra's skin tone and her or Horse Woman's hair. A mix for sure. Oh yah, I forgot the eyes. Guess since mine don't work I forgot about eyes. Mother had hazel, father's were brown, and mine are fake, so I chose a dark warm brown, somewhat like my father's, I would guess.

As to my figure, it is kind of straight up and down, like Rosie O'Donnell doll's, according to Ann. No Barboid here!

But physical characteristics can't sum up a person's inner traits, though. And what I search for in dolls can't be summed up either in labels like sighted, blind, tall, short, fat, thin, deaf, hearing, gay, or straight. None of those characteristics summed up who Ann was, not at all. If anything, she was Trapped in a body which didn't fit her spirit. Am I? Are we all?

What is it I need to know about myself, that I'm a good person, I guess. All my life I have tried hard to do those things I understood a good, kind, generous, caring person Should do, because I believed my Real self to be the Opposite of All of these qualities. I thought I was Evil, the only way to have any power at all, if the adults around you won't allow you to be anything good. What's true?

I was lost between 9 and 12, but the pain of my life began a few weeks after birth. Is that why I like dolls of differing sizes which could be ages 8 to 12? Obviously, but how do I get me back, find all of the scattered shattered pieces and weave them together into something recognizable, can this be done?

I crave the brilliant colors and strong spices of India, Vietnam, and Thailand, tamales and frijoles, tortillas and fish. Often I want to cover my head with shawls or heavy scarves, but not the front of my face. I know somehow that chadors were meant to be a modest form of self-expression and beauty, softer colors than saris in India, but lovely fabrics, thin and filmy, or heavier and embroidered, not the drab blue bourka or the black cloth shroud. Am I wrong? I should research this out of curiosity.

Some music gives me unpleasant feelings, Middle Eastern music, (though I tend to like music by middle Eastern people who have grown up in the West, it feels different,) I like the arhu from China but neither Kabuki nor Chinese Opera. Flutes I love, wherever they come from. I like Creole music and blues. South American music has lovely flutes, but some feels quite harsh while some feels more gentle.

There is more than One shape of face from Mexico or Any Latino country, more than One face of China, More than One face of anywhere, and when it comes to the U.S.? We Are a mestizo people!

I should have written earlier that I was taught re-incarnation as a kid. Cherokees who hold to traditional beliefs believe in it, so do Buddhists. But my parents were Edgar Casey followers, trying to explain why my father was dying of cancer in his thirties, when he had never smoked.


If all of the above means anything I must have lived a long time in many places. Many Crossroads kinds of places. I Hope I'm close to being Done with suffering! Like Tracy Chapman says in a song on her album "Let it Rain" "Let me be closer, Let me be".
Was sewing all day yesterday Only to find out I used the Wrong color of thread! ANNOYING! Kind of like the time I typed a multi-page college term paper with the wrettched machine on Stencil. Lots of blank pages. Guess that tells you how old I am. With computers the problem is knowing when the printer is Out or Running out of ink. Just like Roseann Roseanna Danna said, "It's always something!"

Can "Big Foot Barbies stand up?" Probably not. The term sounds funny though, like on a talk radio show that's always reporting sightings of "Big Foot". I wonder if anyone's ever sighted Big Foot Barbie wandering around in the woods? I suppose she's not effected by misquito bites, plastic only bubbles that way when exposed to heat.

Another question, are there any fashion dolls with black straight or only slightly wavy hair and fairly light skin? I look for dolls which look like me, not to be found. All of the dolls with dark hair and eyes are African American, Kiras, and once in a while, Latino. But there are a lot of people here who are Native enough to have dark hair and eyes, but fairly light skin and I've never seen a doll like that. It must be a regional thing, because I have met people from other places whose parents or grandparents came from Poland or other countries in Eastern Europe who have heavy dark hair and yet are not people of color. Are there Polish or Bulgarian looking dolls somewhere in Chicago or Phily, fo that matter? Some Latinos here have Native heritage and fairly light skin as well.

Do other doll collectors look for dolls which at least vaguely resemble themselves? I would think that probably no one finds them, because we, like other creatures on Earth are each unique. Just wondering.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Generation Gap, Overcoming

One of the things I miss since Ann died is having someone who understands both the issues and the jokes which were/are critical to my own generation. An uncle, 9 years older than me did 3 tours in Vietnam. In a way, he gave most of his life to and for that war, even though he came home. He died at 62, partly from the effects of Agent Orange and other toxic chemicals dropped from the air into the jungle. My uncle parachuted into those same jungles, behind "enemy lines." Both Ann and I knew other veterans of that war who came back wounded, physically and emotionally. Younger people and those who have chosen to forget seem so surprised at the horrific wounds our soldiers are bringing home with them. They also seem suprised at the atrocities commited by some of our soldiers. But that is the nature of War, All War, and that is the reason it should Only be Considered as a last Resort! Ann and I were Deeply saddened by the decision of President Bush to invade Iraq and stay for oil, as we saw it, Because we hadn't fortotten Vietnam. And now members of Congress are upset because the Iraqis are Ungrateful! and selling their oil to China and Russia. Once Sadam Hussein was gone, if the war had Not been fought for oil, we could have left. We might have left some infrastructure intact that way.

More importantly, once we discovered NO weapons of mass destruction, we could have left. But Oil was supposed to pay us back for the deaths, wounds, and homelesness of our soldiers who came home. Now it Won't!

Evidently President Clinton had contengency plans for invading Iraq, so it sounds like it was a "big business/government" plan for a long time.

The book "Slaughter House Five" was banned in the Republic, Mo. school system, along with a couple of others I haven't read. Now it is only Partially banned, as a reader has to get Written Permission from parents to check it out! Both Ann and I read that book as teenagers.

C. S. Lewis once wrote (I think it might have been in "The Screwtape Letters") that the ideal condition for messing up humans and leading them into destruction was to teach them to lop their Own heads off, in order to "fit in."

Many provisions of the Patriot Act make good sense. But I've Never liked the idea of a librarian being forced to keep tabs on what I read. Well the people of Republic, Mo. seem to be lopping off their children's heads, in order to Help them "fit in" better.

Ann and I loved reading books which taught us something new, about a period in history, another culture, or an unexplored set of facts.

Our jokes were largely based on late 1960's and 1970's music. We had a sort of "name that Tune" thing where something one of us said or something heard on the news would provoke the beginning of a relevant song from the other. And, as I've already mentioned, we played silly word games, making up non-existent words to describe something.

I found among my possessions an old book of fairy tales given to my father for me by a disabled man named Bud, from Ozark, Mo. I asked Ann to read it to me as I'm not too proud to read a good kids book And I was curious. What a shock! The book was Filled with three sylable words which I don't remember having Any trouble understanding as a child! Words like those would Lose most children now!

Ann and I always joked about what rock songs we wanted played at our funerals, although neither of us could afford more than cremation policies. Would it be "Jesus is just all right with me?" "Goin' up to the spirit in the sky" "the wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'", "stairway to heaven" or what?
We used to laugh imagining the shock of older relatives and the confusion of younger friends.

But there Are advantages in having younger friends. First, they challenge my brain, forcing me to understand cell phone talk (LOLRF) (How many times is that Really true?) and to enjoy things like, "Damn You Autocorrect." I have to learn new words and also I have to learn How younger people learn. Dora the Explorer teaches Spanish and multi-culturalism which Ann and I read books to learn. From the perspective of a blind person, things are difficult, as so much more material is available to sighted people now, both instantly and Visually. A picture is Much faster than a verbal description, but it does me no good at all. Yet people both take and have access to pictures on their cell phons.

I am Greatly aided by younger people in computer use! They may not know keyboard commands, but can do things in Seconds with the rodent, (mouse) which would take me hours or days. Part of this is their better computer literacy compared to me, and part of it is the unfriendliness of many websites to screen readers.

Having younger friends also makes me aware that we are truly in different cultures, and I get a chance to learn about theirs. For instance, one of the things which many younger people find funny is the repeating of stupid or annoying actions over and over. I don't understand why this is funny, but I know it is. To me, most of the "Saturday Night Live" of more recent years is less funny than the beginning few years of that show. I don't know why today's version is funny, but I understand that some younger people find it so. It Is like entering another culture and I must try to understand and keep up. Good for the brain, but not easy.

Often Ann or I would quote Gilda Radner from the old Saturday Night Live, (Emily LaTella, or Roseann Roseanna Danna) and younger people seemed to think we were laughing at some inner-planetary joke. But when the origin of "Never Mind" uttered in that Particular voice, was explained, (if someone sat still long enough) the younger people also found skits about "Presidential erections" and "Endangered Feces" funny. If we let ourselves, we can learn a lot from one another. It's not easy, but it Is important.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Positive Changes and a Doll Seller I Like

First, in response to "A Phily Collector" I can't speak about dolls which are Supposed to represent Ireland. But I went to school with a girl with pale milky skin, blue eyes, and soft, curling black hair who was Irish. Bet no one Dares to make a doll like that, Why?

Second, since Ann died I've been concerned about my excessive behaviors: not eating, overeating, buying too many dolls, and one day I Finally realized on an Emotional level, where it counts, that None of these things would either make me happy in any kind of permanent way, Or fill the hole left by Ann in my life. For that matter, they can't fill most of the holes left by my early life either.

Then, again, on an emotional level, I realized that, having been trained to hate myself, This behavior hadn't either made me happy or filled Any emotional holes Either. What this discovery did for me was to allow me to release all of the things I felt I had done wrong in a 20 year relationship with Ann. Disagreements, arguments, mistakes, things I don't know How I could have done differently, but still Wish I had because they hurt Ann's feelings or made her angry, all of the accumulated stuff of a relationship lasting 20 years and a friendship lasting thirty.

Self-blame and self-criticism, being judgmental with myself for Failing to be Perfect, for being human, these things were Just as Toxic, if not More than my excessive behaviors!

And what has happened since then is a gradual lessening of misery. I still think of Ann each day. Something, a song, a favorite food of hers or ours, something she would have been interested in if she were here, there is No shortage of reminders that she is gone!

The difference is that Now I am more Free to Miss the Good times we had together, and to miss Ann, her voice, her laugh, her singing, the blues festival, Halowene, books read together and discussed, "doll greeding" beneficial changes she made in my life. Somehow, Ann's birthday was a turning point. I think now that I have stopped hating myself for being Human, things will be easier. I will and do still continue t miss Ann and I will keep trying to find ways to honor her memory, like a day sponsorship of our local NPR station dedicated to her, but my unhappiness doesn't feel so unbearably Heavy now! This is a scary (because it is new) but very Positive Change for me.

I'm not looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas without Ann, no presents for one another, or trying to psych. out what would make Ann happy. But somehow I will get through it, other people do, every single day. I am free now to remember the Good Times, for which I am Grateful!

New Subject: A doll site I check in on every once in a while and which I like is "Dolls Like Me." They have ethnic, religious, (no Buddhist) and multi-cultural dolls, including Mixis, "Fair Trade" and organic doll clothing. They also have ethnic party supplies, books for kids, and skin and hair care products.

No one has had the time to answer my question about renter's insurance to cover doll collecttions and fabric, but I am curious to know what you think.

A postsccript to that is that last week a friend found a ski mask in one of the trees in my back yard, from where the attempted break-in occured. It had been rained on, chewed by animals,and after thinking about it I pitched the thing. What could the police Do about it? They just don't have the funds anymore to try and get a hair sample DNA tested, Even if one could be found, for an "attempted break-in" which failed. I hope I did the right thing. We don't have enough officers here and DNA testing costs money. But it was creepy anyway!

I dread going out in the partially dark at night with the dog, and if we get a blizzard like last year, or even a lesser snow, it'll cover the rises and dips in the ground which I use as a partial guide to know where I'm going. It will also freeze gates to the back yard shut, and may well finish rotting what feels like the old barn gate which is one of those to the back yard. I like that gate. It is worthless as a blocker to the yard, but tells me where the back yard Begins. Oh well, it Isn't snowing, after dropping from eighty to fifty for a high temp. last week, today was in the seventies. And, if the gate Truly rots, then Both gates can't freeze shut. We humans are amazingly talented at comming up with things to worry about. It will just be the first Winter in twenty years that I have spent alone. One day at a time Is best!

Friday, October 21, 2011

It isn't that I'm incapable of feeling rage or vengeful thoughts, but sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me. Today when I heard that Colonel Gidafe was shot, then dragged somewhere, then driven to a town which had suffered much during the Libyan war so people could have their pictures taken with his dead body I just felt sad.

I don't like rulers or dictators who murder or torture their own people. This includes Colonel Gidafe, Sadam Hussein, their sons who behave like them, Or the practice of water boarding, which has been ruled to Be torture. It's true we haven't tortured as many people as dictators in other nations. But our government has sent people Away to Be Tortured. And what about All of our "allies" who have killed untold numbers and tortured untold numbers of their Own people with weapons and money our tax dollars and our government have provided? There was General Mont Rios in Guatemala, General Pinochet in Chile, there is Saudi Arabia, the former Shah's secret police in Iran, and we supported both Sadam Hussein and Manuel Noriega of Iraq and Panama, respectively, at one time. Why was the man convicted of the bombing of Pan-Am Flight 103 over Lockerbe Scotland set free? (spelling isn't too horrible, since haven't read most of these names in Braille) I just don't seem to take joy in the killing of anyone.

I am against the death penalty because of the way it is unfairly enforced against people of color and the poor. But sometimes the onnly time people will say, "yes, I did it" is when threatened with death. What I would much Rather see is quick, sure, punishment, separating first time offenders from career criminals, And a program where certain organizations, with a prisoner's permission, take charge of that prisoner's parole or of that prisoner Instead of imprisonment. This could be a church, temple, tribe, etc.

I am told that the Cherokee used to have villages of Sanctuary, and that if a criminal lived long enough to reach one, that person A, couldn't be harmed if B, he/she agreed to submit to village laws and undergo a year of ceremonial training and healing. If such a person did all that was asked for a year, that person was then free to leave and could Not legally be harmed.

Today, with the intense damage done to so many children, I think it might take longer than a year, by the time someone reaches juvenile detention or prison. But I would like to see some alternatives to our overcrowded prisons tried. And I would like to see possession or growing of small amounts of marijuana decriminalized, made Legal. This would Help empty prisons and hopefully aid in saving the lives of our human relatives in Mexico. They don't deserve what our demand for illegal drugs is doing to them!

There must be help for victims of violent crimes and heavy duty restrictions placed on repeat offenders. But although I think there are exceptions to every rule, I don't think I am smart enough to know them. I just don't like "regime change" instituted by murder.

I would rather have seen Colonel Gidafe tried in the ICC (International Criminal Court) than shot and draged away by fighters for the Transitional Government "presumably to a hospital" according to the news, which also did the report about people wanting their pictures taken with his body.

I am not so clear as some Buddhists who say No Capital Punishment for Any Reason. But I have serious objections to it in our country and in our foreign policy.

Heard something else interesting in the news. The ACLU has confronted the FBI on its training of agents in counter-terrorism for stereotyping Muslims. The FBI is reviewing its training, but one thing taught to agents is or was, "Arabs don't think of time as linear, so they can't think in certain ways and this is a weakness." I couldn't Believe it! In the 1980's in Oklahoma I was taught that Cherokees don't see time as linear,
and so are incapable of abstract thought. Some professors at the nearest branch of the University of Oklahoma nearest to where I was living had a saying, "The higher the blood quantum (of Native blood) the lower the grade." meaning that the more Native blood a person had, the less capable that person would be of achieving a high grade. And expectations like That don't influence Decisions?

Not all Muslims are Arab, not all Arabs are Muslims, and some terrorists, like Timothy McVey aren't Muslim at all. Some aren't Arab, either. It is an awfully Simple view of the world to say that this group thinks this way and that group isn't capable of achieving a high goal.

Yes, there Are some generalities, traditional Native peoples tend to see land, the people, animals, and plants, sharing the land with water and stones and sky as a whole inseparable unit. But this Doesn't mean they cannot understand what a mining company wants, they may just Disagree.

But to generalize about a whole group as to their way of thinking or their thought capacities seems to be over the top! If Native people in general are incapable of abstract thought, like Cherokees were and probably are still said to be, how did they create accurate calendars, invent the Concept of Zero, develop sacred geometry, corresponding with specific times of year, and build pyramids, develop etching with acid before Europeans, and contribute just over Half of the world's current food crops? Sounds a bit abstract to me, whether or Not it's Linear.

Anyway, the news was heavy today, I'm tired and I ramble. But to me it all seems interconnected. Oh dear, do I lack the ability to understand linear time? What weaknesses and what strengths wojuld that give me?

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Weather, Occupy Movement, Dolls

This weather is Nuts! Monday it was 80. Last night there was frost and it was in the 30's! Burrrr! It's not that the temperature is so unbearably cold, it's just the Shock of the change and the North Wind.

When I talk with others about the "Occupy Wallstreet" movement they have all kinds of objections to it. They say, 1. The protesters don't have a universal agenda, 2. any time someone protests, there are people who Want to fight with the police. and 3. It won't get anywhere, so why give it time or energy?

I disagree. The agenda is quite diverse, as the damage large corporations have done and are doing is widespread. Who is the largest environmental polluter? It's Not households, it's Large corporations. Who makes nuclear weapons? Same answer. Who moves jobs overseas whenever they are given tax breaks, and who keeps paying obscene salaries and Bonuses to corporate CEO.'s, Even when the company is bailed out by the tax payers? Who profits most from wars and Who has paid lobyists and can afford to make huge campaign contributions? The Same entities, large, multi-national corporations.

As a doll collector I am part of the problem. Sometimes people who make dolls work in sweatshop conditions and dolls are made of rubber and plastics, which are usually petroleum byproducts. And the sacred Boxes dolls come in seem to account for at least Half of their value! The all mighty NRFB if continued, keeps me from enjoying any doll. But after a tornado rocked my house on its foundation, cracking the foundation, and the insurance company Refused to fix my home, all I could Do was snatch dolls as quickly as possible from the water streaming into the basement and recycle the saturated boxes, certificates of authenticity, stickers, and other paper items. So I still enjoy my dolls, but financially I have a nearly Worthless doll collection.

I bought that house in May and the tornado hit the next Jan., so I hadn't paid in much in terms of premiums. I went through the hassle, with the Very kind help of Miss Alice, of documenting what dolls I had and their market value, for Nothing. If they wouldn't fix my home, the insurance company, with its Tripple A rating Certainly wouldn't cover damage to Dolls.

So I got interested in doll rehab., a good thing. I bought up dolls with ratty hair I could fix, faded eyes, and dirt. I do not know how to reroot hair or make wigs, so I avoid those dolls.

I can sell them for less, hopefully, after making nice bright unusual clothing for them, and poorer people will have an option for buying a nice, though not New doll for their kids. So a big corporation got me into some recycling, but should I thank them since I lost my home?

There is a Buddhist saying, "If you want peace, BE peace." Ann and I, after many months of struggle, came to the conclusion that we would rather let that house go back to the bank, than continue being ill from the constant mold wafting up through the heat vents, and our efforts to kill it. I only have one and a half lungs, due to a childhood illness. When we had both made up our minds, that is what we did.

I've thought about buying renter's insurance here. But could I trust them to pay? Do any of you rent and have renter's insurance covering your doll collections?

Hey, I go a look at the Japan DOW Ken. I like long hair on guys, so long as it's clean. He obviously works out, but he has a waist and a nice, Non-Kira face. He's kind of a foxx, dare I call a male a fox? They do come in two sexes, you know.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Doll Store and Hobbit Dolls

I actually got to GO to a store with Toys, as in Dolls today! Man I wish I had Working eyeballs! They would have been scoping that place out at Lightning speed. (smiling) Maybe it's better I don't, I still Have a bank balance. The kind friend who took me was saying "I used to have dolls, now I wonder Why I liked them." So many thoughts came pouring out of my Head that I'm surprised we weren't Both inandated with those cartoon baloons full of thoughts I have heard described in print cartoons. Maybe we were, and my friend just pretended not to notice, who knows?

I almost never catch sales, because I can't Get there from here, and even if I could, I'd need help finding my way around those monster stores where displays are always being Moved to capture Your eyeballs.

I had a Terrible attack of the "wanna see what it looks like, open box now!!!! But managed to keep quiet. Whew!

I haven't been to a Doll selling isle in a couple of years. I am Very Thankful for my friend the doll inspector who is A, patient with me and B, an excelent describer. That is a rare talent. I always have questions like, "Is her/his face a believable one for where this doll is said to have come from? What color and kind of hair, (length, textured, curly or straight, length) and eyes, and skin tone, and facial expression? Dolls who aren't smiling big are hard to find. Is tthis doll a giand head for his/her body? I don't usually care about clothing, I can make that. What kind of feet, can he/she stand up, (never can tell, as feet are burried in box) and how tall is she/he?

Hey, why do they give All dolls but baby dolls such long legs and little bodies? And have you noticed how Low the knees are? I know that "beauties" or "hunks" are supposed to be paper thin and have long legs, big boobs, and long hair. But Some of us are just Born Short! I never met a Cherokee woman over five feet, five inches tall when I lived in Western Cherokee Nation in Oklahoma, and that lady was the exception. And Some of us were Given long "hobbit (one or two B's in that word, computer won't tell me) bodies." No, I wasn't insulted by the term, hobbits seem generally happy people who get along well with others. I Like hobbit-bodied dolls, makes me feel better, just like a beauty or hunk with dark eyes or hair. Blonde is beautiful on real humans, but so are brown, red, black, and all of the mixed shades of these colors.

So Up, Up, with hobbit bodies, I say, shorter legs with knees near the Middle, and strong tll trunks, like Trees!

Ann and I used to bug one another about this, she had very long legs but when we sat, I, yes, I, was taller. So there were lots of short people verses stork jokes floating around. Maybe that is why I like the High School Musical and Skipper dolls, except for the clone faces of the Skipper and friends. They are all Hobbits, like ME!

I remember asking Ann if Barbie's "Northwest Coast Native American doll" looked like the humans on the box. She said "Yes, they really do, except that she's taller than the rest." Of course, people belonging to some Northwest Coast Nations are tall, maany Native people are tall. But there are hobbits born among All of us, and I wish this could be seen in doll world. Personally, I like short wiry guys, sorry Ken, you just don't do it for me. Maybe that's why I like the Joey Benetardi (sorry dude) doll and Prince Menelek, by Olmec, he isn't short, but he has a waist, is thinner, plus a non-Ken face.

More than enough for now, HOBBITS, UNITE!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Working Weekend and Dolls a Luxury

Had a working weekend. With the help of a friend, got garage cleaned out from moving at end of last week. Spent weekend washing lots of dishes, some of which I now do not need, just cooking for one. Luckily, found them a new home, some of them. Did laundry, extra towels and blankets were wrapped around dishes. Did beading on doll skirt until needle broke.

Does anyone get hypnotized by their coputer like I do when checking out doll sites? I've found something which might interest someone besides me. In poorer cultures, kids, especially girls, seem to have always had dolls, or doll substitutes. This isn't a surprise. If nothing else, they get to practice all of the hard work they get to do as grownups, (Oh joy.) But in those cultures dolls are Not made to last. Native american dolls in general were made of plants (buffalo grass dolls, for example) leather scraps, or other biodegradable materials. When they wore out, was it time for little girls to begin their jobs in ernest? Was it just undersstood that a fascination with dolls was so temporary that they weren't made to last?

What got me interested was looking at dolls from developing countries. These tend to be art pieces made to be sold to wealthier people, or to be non-moving figures, sometimes with their feet glued to stands.

Do any of you consider such figures dolls? I like the articulation of action figures. But figures which accurately represent the clothing and faces and hair styles of the peoples making them are also of interest to me. I cannot play with them, but I can learn from them. What do you think, are they dolls?

It seems that except in families wealthy enough to have collected porcelain dolls for generations, doll collecting is a modern luxury for the wealthy of all countries, and for the West in particular.

I called the American Girl Company and told them about the site which described Kaya, their Native American Historical Character, and her people, as "less inteligent" when Europeans came. They were very nice about it, apologizing, but since I couldn't re-locate that site to give them an exact link, I don't know if anything will be changed. I spent hours looking for it.

Someone told me their were some dolls called Something like Magic or Magic Atic dolls which were 18 inch vinyl dolls that looked similar to American Girl Dolls and were more Affordable. I know the Phily Collector site is dedicated to Barbie sized dolls. But has anyone ever looked at others??

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Native American Girl LESS Inteligent

I have been told that the American Girl dolls are the second larges sellers after Barbie. It's been suggested that I buy one, and use her to sew for. So I began looking around online. Those dolls are Expensive! But I thought it sounded like a quality series for a young girl's role model, UNTIL I found Kaya, a Nez Perce Native American dol. I won't mention who was selling her until I contact the company and give them a chance to deal with the situation. But I "learned" that when Europeans came here Indians just weren't as inteligent and they were also out gunned. Outgunned, yes. Less smart, now That's a Great message to send to a young Native American Girl, Isn't it?

Do any of you know if the American Girl series has other lovely garbage in its promo. materials or if they allow sellers to say what they Want?

All you have to do to find out if something is racist is to ask, how would an African American perceive this if it were said of him or her? How would African Americans feel about having "Negro" mascots for their sports teams, stereotypes in tact? How would African Americans feel about Haloween costumes depicting them, stereotypes in tact? And how would African American people react to an expensive African American doll, bought for a little girl, being said to be Less inteligent?

Friday, October 14, 2011

I did it, and a Military Intervention I Could Support

First, I did do what I wanted in memory of Ann's birthday. I skulked along the trees in the yard and a Small space with a bit of privacy fence. I was able to sing, once back inside the the house, a thing which, except for the blues tape, I have been unable to do since Ann died. It was a gratitude song!

On NPR tonight it seems that President Obama has authorized 100 military advisors to aidin the capture of the leader and top officials in the "Lord's Resistance Army." When little children must creep nightly into city centers, trying to avoid this group which for 20 years has abducted them, using the boys as soldiers ad the girls as servants and sexual slaves to soldiers, I agree with the President. This particular group is known for sending child soldiers, under threat of death and mutilation, back to their home villages to murder their own familis. Some children have run away from villages where the LRA was near, to live as street kids of eight years and up, in cities, so they Won't be kidnapped.

One Problem though, am I forgetting or didn't our intervention in El Salvador and Nicaragua start with "military advisors?" The LRA covers a large area of several African countries, though they are said to be few in number. We Cannot commit to participation in Another war, and I hope this situation isn't for corporate profit from the Democratic Republic of the Congo's rich natural resources. That country too, has suffered gross human rights violations by the LRA.

The people of Northern Uganda live where the LRA started andhave suffered longest from the horrors they perpetrate. Yet They have a sacred ceremony oof forgiveness, which once performed with a former child soldier from their family and village, allows that person to rejoin in their community life. I honor and am humbled by the spiritual power of those who can live this much forgiveness. There is a news story covered by the BBC which I'll never forget!

Ann's Birthday and "Minority Princess Series" dolls

It is so Hard to do what Buddhism teaches us to do with painful feelings, neither to run from or supress them, nor to "ramp them up" making them stronger and wallowing in them. My problem is trying Not to run away from emotional pain via pleasant distractions, eating, walking, reading, doll greeding (wish listings).

Yesterday was no exception, it was hard. I distracted myself more than I wish I had, but I Did get through the day. Not looking forward to Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc.

I found out there is No Privacy in my yard, Anywhere! No, I wasn't streaking.

It is a Buddhist custom at times, (I was going to do it because I Wanted to) to sit with a person's favorite food, thinking of them. Then to take it outside and donate it in that person's name. The animals will eat it.

When Ann and I shared another address, there was a part of the yard screened by a neighbor's privacy fence. I went there to do ceremonial things. Thiis is, for the most part a Very Christian, mostly strict Protestant, area of the country. So I always try to do anything Not particularly Christian in Private.
Why don't I live in the country? I wish I could! But I am totally blind, more than %500 deaf now, and I don't feel safe in a town. Even from a very small town, it is hard to get transport to Dr.'s etc.

So, I will just have to go out in my yard and do what I need to do anyway. I guess people can Just get over it. I'm not harming anyone and not putting out food, such as the sweetener xylotol (pronounced zylatol) which is dangerous to dogs, or chocolate, which can kill birds. Still, it is difficult to belong to a religious minority which is quite misunderstood by mot people. And as Buddhism is not a missionary religion, with the exception of one group, I don't go around arguing with Christians and trying to explain anything.

New subject: One part of my distraction last night was to look at dolls via the internet. I went to
chinasprout.com and looked (listened to a description of) a new series called the "Minority Princess Series". At the moment, it has three dolls. They are Mongolian, Dong, and Tibetan/Zang. Their clothing is interesting and each wears different clothing. Some of you might be interested, as I was.

But when a friend visually inspected them for me today, she was fascinated by their clothing, but their faces were done in the Aname style, though each had a differing face. They are $18.95 each, and that site has decent shipping rates.

I decided not to get them, as my sighted doll inspector said none of their faces looked real. As many different peoples live in China, India, Burma or Meinmar, and many other nations, African nations as well, Why don's doll makers stop being lazy and Show some of these beautiful differences? For a blind person, companies' laziness about accurate faces is equivalent to having only one color for all dolls, or maybe two shades of skin tone. I guess their are blind people who collect dolls for clothing, just like some sighted collectors. I just happen to want dolls which Teach me something about my fellow human relatives (all people) which I cannot learn on my own. Anyway, some of you might enjoy checking them out, I hope so.

Thanks to the peson who wrote about most believable doll faces. I agree, 12 inch action figures are dolls by another name. My doll inspector looked at some Power Team guys and said they look like real men. She wasn't interested in looking for female dolls. Do the Jetti (must be spelling it wrong, can't get the comuter to say it right) from Star ars look human?

Occupy Wall Street,

Some people say the Occupy Wall Street movement is not worth investing any energy in. It is true that many of us Americans ran up debt we couldn't pay. It is also true that the protests are about a wide range of issues, because huge banks and multi-national corporations effect everything from te quality of our environment, to who gets the campaign funds they want, thus making it Much more likely that they will be elected. I don't think Any CEO. is worth thirty million dollars or more. And I resent the fact that the Supreme Court has given corporations the Same rights, All of the rights, American citizens are supposedly allowed. So, if a group of corporate lawyers were to disgrace themselves enough to protest about something would the police be called in with tear gas?

Subject: Urgent: Eviction for Occupy Wall Street
Hi,
I just found out that the Occupy Wall Street protesters are being
evicted from Zuccotti Park at 7am tomorrow morning.
Mayor Bloomberg is sending in the police to clear the park so it can be
"cleaned" and is imposing new rules that won't allow protesters to
continue to occupy the park.
These protesters have been standing up for all of us against corporate
greed on Wall Street and the corporate takeover of our democracy. It's
time we stand with them. Please join me in urgently signing a petition to
Mayor Bloomberg to keep him from evicting the protesters. Just use the
link below.
http://civic.moveon.org/defend_ows/?r_by=31975-9089709-0gqCT4x&rc=c4_defend_ows_letter.email.g0
Thanks!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Wearing a Sari

I've had a great desire to wear brightly colored garments for a long time. Don't have the money for them until they turn up at Good Will or DAV stores, but Love the feel of silk, embroidery (if the pattern is big enough to interpret by touch) shawls, scarves. They don't turn up very often.

I went on Ebay, just for curiosity's sake and found Loads of ventage sari fabric. I bought one and am wearing it now. I feel more comfortable with a shirt under it, but I Love the feel of the silk, draping around.

Then I began feeling bad. When buying luxury items, I try to buy Fair Trade. I bought this for less than $18, including shipping. So, did a poor family give up something they loved, an heirloom belonging to a grandmother, to survive another day or week?

I can't shop at pawn shops because I know that everyone who has to pawn something Usuallyy Wants it back, and Hopes it Won't Sell.

Native American families have had to sell jewelry or beaded items which have been in their families for generations, bo buy groceries.

I love the sari, but won't be buying more saris or sari fabric on Ebay, unless I find them Fair Trade Certified by the Fair Trade Federation. I haven't found a Fair Trade site selling saris. I don't wear this one in public, it just makes me Very happy to be in it at home. But I don't want to hurt other people by buying them cheap.

New subject: Help Keep Medicaid for low income people who are Fortunate enough to get it.
>
Please take action and share with your networks.
Thanks to Families USA and Bazelon Center
for Mental Health Law for much of the content of this email. Michelle
CALL
1-866-922-4970
TODAY AND TELL CONGRESS TO PROTECT MEDICAID!
Medicaid's ability to serve low-income children and adults -- including those with
mental illnesses and other disabilities -- is at risk! Your calls helped prevent
cuts during the debt-ceiling compromise, which created the 12-member, bipartisan
“super committee.” Charged with developing a proposal by Thanksgiving to reduce the
federal deficit by at least $1.2 trillion, the super committee could open the door
to harmful cuts to Medicaid.
It is vital that lawmakers hear from you now about the importance of Medicaid to
children and adults with mental disabilities. Medicaid cuts would jeopardize critical
health care and supportive services, including a range of home- and community-based
services, for vulnerable Americans.
What You Can Do: Take advantage of the toll-free number
1-866-922-4970
to the Capitol Switchboard, provided courtesy of Families USA, to call your
U.S.
representative and two senators. The message:
“TELL THE SUPER COMMITTEE: NO CUTS TO MEDICAID. IT KEEPS PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES
HEALTHY AND INDEPENDENT!”
You can keep your message simple by using the talking points below, but if you have
a good personal story about how Medicaid is benefitting someone you know (or yourself),
please share it.
The Super Committee must do no harm to Medicaid and the Affordable Care Act! Cutting
Medicaid and the Affordable Care Act would harm millions of Americans, especially
children and adults with disabilities, jeopardizing their ability to live integrated
and independent lives in the community.
Medicaid is a major driver of economic growth in the states -- cutting it could severely
worsen our already troubled state economies.
Use a balanced approach to deficit reduction, with fair revenue increases and careful
spending cuts that do no harm to vulnerable Medicaid beneficiaries.
1 in 5 people with disabilities lives below the poverty line and Medicaid is their
only source for healthcare. Better health means better ability to live in the community
and stay out of more expensive nursing homes.
Medicaid is a lifeline and the major source of funding for mental health treatment.
Many critical benefits such as prescription drugs, case management and rehabilitative
services are optional under Medicaid – but are not “optional” in the lives of individuals
living with serious mental illness.
For more info on this issue:
http://familiesusa2.org/assets/pdfs/Threats-to-Medicaid-Continue.pdf

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Ann's Birthday and a doll question

Tomorrow would have been Ann's birthday, had she lived past the first of Feb. this year. We had a whole line of goofy jokes about my being an Older friend, (by six months) and Ann's alleged "lack of proper respect for her elders" When the jokes about my ancientry (don't know if that's a word, but it should be, I like it.) got too ridiculous, I'd just tell Ann she was rolling down the same hill as me! But no more. No figuring out what Ann would like for her birthday, more paints o art supplies, David Gray (or Grey, I'm not sure) music? A book about faces, of paintings, and where would she like to eat? A steak, an Indian Restaurant in Springfield, is there Really a good fish place, (Ann grew up in N.E. Indiana and had access to Great Lakes fish.

No more. I will get physically older without her, and my birthday will never be the same either.

I have a piece of Peshawari (hope I spelled it right) nan bread. Tomorrow I will scatter it outside for animals to eat in Ann's name. Something she loved but had to stop eating, due to both diabetes and Celiac disease.

This is a difficult week. I can't sleep unless I take a Valerian Root capsule at night. Then it is SO hard to get up! Things like coffee which I love, or spices, burn my stomach. I feel Heavy! But it's all part of the process, I know. Don't know if I'll write tomorrow.

So on to a doll question. I am Dellighted that all of those Kiras Now have the Option of dating a Japanese or Japanese-American man! Finally! Thank you for telling us about this, Phily Collector.

My question is this: What doll or dolls have the most unusual and yet Believably Human Faces? I found a picture of the DOW. Japan Ken and was told yes, he Did look like a Japanese or Japanese-American man who worked out a lot. The unusual doll with the believable face can be male or female. As someone who searches for new faces, I'm just curious about what Pro collectors think.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Doll Greeding

Some of the Best Times of Our Lives

Sometimes, three or four times per year, Ann and I would come into Springfield, Mo. And go "doll greeding." Sometimes this meant taking a cab from Wal-Mart to K-Mart, to Toys'r-Us. Obviously, we had more money then than I do now. But at other times when we were in town we went to a shop run by a lady everyone called Miss Alice. She and her mother worked their and Miss Alice had Zillions of dolls! Most of them were Barbies, and occasionally she had a Jem, Maxi and Robbie, or a celebrity or Disney doll.

The trips to stores were sneak attacks, because I wasn't supposed to Touch anything. Ann would look around for unusual dolls and describe them to me. Then she'd hook one with her cane, if it was too high to reach, and one of us Nearly always caught the box on the way down. "Good Save". Steps one (finding some unusual doll) and step two, (Touching the box, Or snagging it) accomplished!

Of course, it wasn't necessary to snag a box too often, the kids had to be able to Grab them, after all.

Then came the tricky part. Look around, is it Mission Impossible? Figure out how the box is Supposed to open. Is it tabs along the side, each securely taped down into its slot? (Needs Careful handling, 007.) Or is it a tab in the top or just tape, (yeah, a key will do the trick, If you don't get caught!)

Actually all of this unnecessary drama was nerve racking, most of the time. I cqall it Unnecessary because it would have been So Much Easier to simply explain to a power that be that I am blind and only wanted to touch the face and hair of a few dolls. We made sure to clothes boxes in Just the way they were Supposed to open, whenever possible. We Never Took any doll Or anything from a doll's box. If we couldn't close the box Exactly as it had been, we closed it securely, so it looked like it hadn't been opened.

Ann described the doll's general look, hair, eyes if she could see them, and clothes. I nearly always Just touched the face and hair, to see if the doll fit my idea of what I wanted or needed.

If I couldn't decide, we put the doll's box in the cart until we were through looking. Then we went through them one at a time, and decided which were affordable with the funds available. That was nerve racking, too.

Each of us came to recognize "That tone in your voice" which meant the other one Really felt attracted toward a particular doll, really Wanted it. "Now before we check out, are you Sure you don't want to get . . . You've got that Tone in your voice" etc.

We would come home exhausted from our spy runs and take our time, resting and opening doll boxes to examine our purchases slowly and deliberately. Then we went, each to her room, and either stayed up redressing the doll/s, re-styling their hair, or just setting them up where we wanted them to live in our rooms.

But then there were trips to Miss Alice's shop! Ann and I would go there when ever both Miss Alice and we had a chance to look around for at Least a couple of hours. Miss Alice opened boxes herself, to make sure it was done right, and then allowed me to touch the Whole doll, on its box liner. She soon learned that I would touch dolls very gently, and with clean hands, so that no one could tell the doll Had been touched. We would make two piles, the "I'm not sure" pile and the "Yes" pile. Before I made a final decision, we'd always go through them again. Those not purchased by us would be closed up by Miss Alice and her trusty roll of Scotch Tape.

Those were some of the Best times of my life, and when Ann was not in too much pain, of her life, too.

Ann loved to look around at all of the dolls. She favored certain kinds, to buy. Others, she just enjoyed seeing. And she helped look for unusual ones, as did Miss Alice, for me. In this way I found Bohemian Barbie, with the cool cherry red hair and interesting clothes, Byron Lars' "In the Lime Light" which I like a lot, except for that fur so tight feeling around her neck, and Banee, Jem, Rosa Exotica by Bob Mackey, the kente cloth Barbies, and more. What was especially cool was that I could ask Miss Alice questions like, "What would you say are Asian Barbies with the face Least like the usual Kira face?" Among her dolls at the time were a roller blading Kira, and the old DOW from Korea. These both have Kira-like faces, to touch, but did not Look the same.

Miss Alice sold her shop which is now online and in another part of the state. But I will never forget the happy and nosy hours of discovdery Ann and I spent in her shop.

There Really Isn't a way to put into words how much fun we Had! Thank You Ann, and Miss Alice, and your mom, Dorothy.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Ways in Which I Used Dolls to Heal

Ways in Which I have used Dolls to Heal

In Buddhism, nothing is pre-judged as either Good, or Bad. It is usually a person's motivation, and the use a person makes of an object or situation which determines whether or not it is beneficial.

For me, dolls have been Very helpful. Most sighted people with what the shrinks now call DID look in a mirror and actually See the alter, person, inner part, which is manifesting itself through their mind and body. Obviously, a blind person cannot do this. But projection of the fragmented parts of one's mind happens usually, so that this part of the mind can be interacted with.

I heard of one blind multiple who only had toy dishes to play with. So Each of those dishes took on a character, a personality.

I was luckier in having farm and circus animals as a kid. They took on personalities.

But when as an adult, I discovered Dolls, and dolls with Black hair, (I hadn't played with toys for years) I fell in love.

My first doll as an adult was a Kira with straight black hair and turquoise eyes. She was very sad and I named her Kira Sky, because of her unusual eyes. That's how I picked out dolls. Some that I touched had no emotions. Others immediately seemed to Be a certain kind of person. It was These I was drawn to.

After bringing them home, I dressed some in the kinds of clothes the names I had been called, and internalized, would wear. Ann painted the faces and bodies of some of her dolls, and some of mine, upon request. So I have a Joey Benetarde who looks Latino, a Jesse doll from a TV show I never watched called "Full House" became totally Native and I made him a beaded powwow outfit. Sailor Moon became disabled, when her crown thing was removed, and her face was painted.

A number of little kids lived altogether with NO Adults, in an old closed factory building, (made by Ann and me of cardboard) in Oklahoma. Later I realized it was like the dormitories I grew up in at blind school. Some kids had names which told their stories, "Runs Away" and "Trusts Only Animals". Some dolls were painted as though a sighted person could tell that they were blind.

Some kids traveled around, looking for parents, but it Never worked out. Eventually I learned to stop Hoping for parents, I was too old to have them and had no intention of submitting to orders From them.

I used a lot of Kid Kore and other non-Barbie dolls for the kids. Some Power Ranger girls were teenagers, along with "Growing Up Skippers", actually usually Courtneys or African American Skippers, with dark hair. I have 2 Janets and one Stacie, but one Janet or Stacie face is just like another, by touch.

I am lucky I grew up at a state blind school, in a way. Though houseparents came and went without warning, I grew up with a lot of differing kinds of people. There were rural white kids, usually poor, suburban white kids, and some city white kids. There was a girl from an impoverished section of the state who was half African American and half Native American. There was an African American girl from the same area, and they were Totally different in belief (spirituality) from the African American kids of the inner city. There was a girl blinded when she was raped. There was a girl who was half Japanese and half European American. There were kids with mental disabilities, (I do not know the latest politically correct word for having a lower than average I.Q. or having brain damage). There was a blues program on the local African American radio station on Sat. afternoons, and Church on Sundays from the same station.

We had college students watching over us in the evenings after study hall, to give the houseparents a break. Two were Irish Catholic, one was Japanese, and others were from other states.

So I looked for dolls to express all races, and hair colors, but they had to be Distinct, so I could tell them apart by their Faces and hair.

Some dolls came to represent people I admired. I have two Tracy dolls, to represent Tracy Chapman. I doubt that Any doll really looks like her, but I wish one did. Several dolls have the name of my older sibling.

There were dolls to represent abusive relatives, (some of these are no longer in a sellable condition) and dolls like Captain Sisco and Captain Sulu to represent honorable men.

I took my rage at aspects of myself or abusers out on Dolls, cutting Them instead of Me, or instead of harming another person.

Sometimes when there was a part of me represented by a doll which was harmful and I couldn't control, I put them in "iso". They stood facing a mirror on my dresser, sometimes for months, being unable to look at Anything but themselves. When I checked on them, sometimes they hadn't changed and sometimes they had. All eventually changed. When a change had occurred, I allowed the doll to be with others, under supervision, and gave slowly more freedom.

Then there was the "Theater of the Mind", or that's what I called it. Dolls would take on roles and play them out to their conclusion. This took hours of imagining and obsessing over repeat and long lasting problems. But if I couldn't find a positive way to resolve the issue, I didn't know what to do besides Not acting on the problem at all. This was Definitely a better solution than taking it out in public which would have been physuically dangerous for a blind female to do.

I learned a lot froom my "Theater of the Mind." It's limitations were that if I couldn't Imagine a positive outcome to a situation in which I could Believe, I just had to drop the issue. We all know that imagination can be crushed or limited in most people by experience.

I had to forgive some dolls and let them go. They represented acts of which I was ashamed. Dolls also took on my confusion about sexual identity.

Eventually, I began realizing that there were just a few Core Issues left, each issue being represented in a slightly different way by a different doll. This helped me narrow down the Range of problems still remaining in my life. And I could stop buying dolls which just Seemed to have another angle on the same old tired issue.

Dolls helped me in many ways to make better choices about my behavior. They allowed me to project into them Much which was troubling or difficult. They were tools for Healing.

Then I just got hooked on fascinating dolls with unusual faces, hair, or Once in a while, clothing as well. I have never seen another person's doll collection, but Ann thought I probably had one of the most diverse and unique ones around, who knows?

Saturday, October 8, 2011

What I Like and Dislike in Doll Clothes

In my opinion, Barbie is Usually Overdressed. She must catch the attention of children who play with fashion dolls, so their must be glitz and glam. But a doll can be made Beautiful without Ugly feeling clothing.

Maybe some of you know a number of people who Wear stoles and furs, I don't. I wonder if the clothing I like doesn't sell well.

Clothing I like, has to have an unusual cut and/or some Texture. I love the simplicity of that Birthday Wishes Barbie with the white top and lavender skirt, made of satin, with satin chiffon ruffles floating down from it. It is a simple design but feels beautiful, just like the doll herself.

I like a red haired Barbie called something like "Haught Cauteur" who has a gown which is at least partly maroon. It has velvet spots in it and the rough parts feel like they might be sparkley, don't think that's a word, sorry. I also like the Ghanian Barbie's clothing, And her necklace. They are of an unusual shave, for standard American clothing. She's Way overdone, but I Love the African American Symphony in Chiffon! How could I help it, with all of that lovely fabric to touch?

I have what I think is a "Happy Holidays" African American Barbie with a velvet black gown which has lines of sparkling white glitter on it. This is cool, Ann said the glitter looked like ice cicles. I have made up a pretend dance troupe of some of my favorite dolls, portraying a night, from sunset to sunrise. This particular doll dances the dark of midnight, where her skirt Might have stars on it.

I do not know how authentic her costume is, but Morocan Barbie is also in the dance troupe, as are the old DOW doll from Brazil, a dancer with a dress which I think is silver lace or netting, and blue satin. The silver fabric hooks around her wrists and when she extends her arms out she feels very graceful. I have two of this particular doll, as Ann had learned how to ombre fabric and we were planning to ombre the satin fabrick of one of these gowns, from darkest blue to lighter shades, leaving the silver alone, if possible. Unfortunately, it never got done.

I don't care for her music, but one doll with clothing I like a lot is Britany Spears. I have a multi-layered skirt which looks like differing colors as it is swirled about and fits over a gold colored bodysuit. It is on a Barbie Balerina. I also have a red fau leather bodysuit I couldn't resist and one more Britany Spears outfit, for which I cannot remember the colors.

The gift doll I was given is wearing long braids with beads in them. She is dressed in flowing garments which make her an angel shape, to the touch. She is a new face for me, for which I am thankful!

I like the "Charity Ball Barbie" black and silver gown, Without the stole. That stole gets in the way of my seeing what shape the gown really is.

I have a doll called "Spring Blossom Barbie" (think she was an Avon exclusive, not sure) who has a dotted Swiss dress, over a satin underlayer. When I was a kid, I loved dotted Swiss and was always trying to Read it. (smile) But the stuff Never said Anything that made sense!

The reason I like this doll dress is that it is a simple design.

I like Mulan's brocade tie on skirt, but think it would be interesting to dye one of them another color and tie it and the red one on from the opposite side to the red one, making a skirt somewhat like those worn by some of the Native people of Ecuador.

I like the Jem doll clothes because of their bright colors, unusual cuts, and odd fabrics, from fau leather to rough cloth points on the Pizaz doll.

I love the art deco style of the African American Man's Chinese Theatre Barbie doll.

Dolls who are Overdressed in my opinion are "Radiant Rose Barbie", "Harpest Angel Barbie" and a Hallmark Exclusive doll, blond, with a huge box, fau fur trimmed everything, etc. She is a Barbie, too.

I like the clothing of the old DOW from Chile, and wish the "Princess of the Incan Court" (may not be Quite right as her proper name) had used layers, instead of just using colors to make it Look like she is wearing layers. Some of th "Princess Of" line have cool clothes and jewelry. I wish I had the money to buy an Inuit Legends Barbie to see what her clothes are like and how true to traditional life they might be. Maybe someone who can see her picture could tell me.

Basically, I like textured fabrics, fairly simple lines, and decorating with beads, layers, (but Not TOO many), and what I think Ann referred to as Classic Lines. I liked the clothes for Byron Lars' Moja, but wondered if Anyone would Really wear a headpiece like that doll's. I also like the clothing of "Bohemian Barbie" (not too complex, if you look it over) and of most of the Yue Sai Wawa dolls. There are a couple of Native American Barbies for which I like the outfits, though Native women in older times wouldn't have had access to satin, metalic fringe, etc.

There are some Kid Kore outfits I like, although their Indians always have to wear purple and Pink outfits, Yuck! I like a couple of silky dresses from Kid Kore which are supposed to look like Romani clothing. I like the bright colors of the Kid Kore Romani clothing, (more Color variety than for Native Americans) but again, don't know how real or fake they may be.

I love Mixis leather or fau leather boots! I think there was a "Peace and Love" (1960's style) Barbie with white leather boots, or fau leather anyway. Ann Loved that doll! She had Always wanted white leather boots like that as a teenager, and it made her happy to get them vicariously on the doll. Ann was partial to strawberry (reddish) blonde curly hair. As a teen she had bright red-brown curly hair when, Of course, everyone was wearing it straight.

She also liked the flower balerina, not sure how to spell the word, peoni? And the dolls portraying water, one called "Whispering Wind" and Bob Mackey's Goddess of Africa, or a title similar to that. She gave this doll to her sister because she thought the doll was so gorgeous.

For me most of these dolls were too abstract to feel what they were portraying, except for the one I always called the "water fountain doll", rude, I suppose, but I don't remember her real name. But her clothing Did feel like the shape of an outdoor fountain with water spraying up out of it. For the same reason, I like the "Dancing Fire" outfit, I think that is the right name.

I like both "Christy's Beauty Secrets" and a Latina looking doll by Bob Mackey (perhaps "Grand Gala?") because they both feel like they are coming up out of the center of a flower.

It would be an interesting challenge to try and create a Concept Doll, like these, which could be Felt and Seen and understood by both blind and sighted people to represent the same concept well.

Not a challenge I'm ready for, yet. Besides the ones already mentioned, I like the Japanese "Lady of the Lake" "Yu Ming Barbie." She feels believable as a concept doll to me.
Things which feel ugly to me are Netting, (Barbie uses Way too Much of the stuff) plastic tierras, (gag) and big plastic jewelry.